Dark Circles
by CumulativeExperience
Summary: "There's no cure for the kind of pain I have, Robin." Raven is experiencing the backlash of Trigon's defeat. Her emotions become less controlled. Voices ring through her head, harassing her daily, pressing her to kill everyone and anyone she holds dear. How will a certain Boy Wonder help her through this…especially during an undercover mission away from the rest of the Titans?
1. Chapter 1

Warning: As this is, in fact, rated 'M', there are bound to be violent, angsty, overly-dramatic, and sexual scenes involved. The use of "mature" language should also be noted.

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own the Teen Titans – cartoon, comic, or any other form.

A/N: This is my first fanfiction ever. ;A; I noticed a shortage of good-quality fanfictions around here, and I burned my way through most of the RavenxRobin fanfictions (both rated M and T)...so I decided to write one instead. Read and review please~

**Dark Circles**

It had been three years since the rise (and fall) of Trigon. The scars left were inevitably etched into the Titans' lives for as long as they allowed themselves to look upon the surviving portal of the disgraced Demon King. While they were recuperating at a rate expected of superheroes, it did not mean that those events did not haunt them from time to time.

They immersed themselves in activities which involved being around their team mates, even if it meant that they would simply do normal things around each other in the common room.

"Friends, we are out of mustard. Can I be informed as to where it can be found?" Starfire's high, melodious voice rang from behind an open refrigerator door. Her usually cheerful demeanour dwindled in the past three years. While it did not affect her abilities, she only found release in assaulting enemies with far stronger green bolts of energy. Her addiction for mustard was not as severe as it was before; now, she only took it as dessert.

"The stash is in the basement, Star," a voice said through the intercom; a voice that the Titans found hard to place a face to. Cyborg immersed himself in making the robotic part of his body stronger along with the defences of their T-shaped home. After the defeat of Trigon, no villain dared cross the Titans in their own territory. It did not mean that new enemies would not take heed of those that they had already placed in jail. Overly paranoid of their safety – particularly Raven's – he barely played games with Beastboy anymore.

There was a small murmur of thanks from Star before she headed out, yet this was downed out by Beastboy and Terra's incessant gaming banter.

In fact, Beastboy refused to let others call him as such. He had remarkably mentally, emotionally and physically matured in those three seemingly short years. The great change was only marked with his insistence for others to refer to him as Changeling. With Trigon's defeat, Terra had also been resuscitated from her statue form, thus allowing Changeling to develop a deeper bond with her.

Robin – now Nightwing – leaned against the bench in the kitchen, arms resting upon its cool marble surface with a coffee mug cupped in his hands, facing his team mates with pride. He knew that they had gone through so many changes, their personalities altering and maturing. Terra and Changeling were playing on the console, while Starfire had just returned from the basement at record speed, already guzzling down her favourite 'delicacy'. Cyborg was probably upgrading his systems again, prepping for a battle that wouldn't require more than a single bat of an eyelash to finish. Frankly, Nightwing was _bored_.

Slade had gone off the face of the earth, and try as he might, Nightwing found no trace of the man. Not even a single transaction.

It was either Slade didn't want to be found while he prepared another scheme (unlikely), or that he had simply retired.

Whichever one seemed like a better option than the lack of crimes happening lately. Everyone – including criminals – was grateful to them. In the end, no one wanted to die in the hands of a demon. They must have thought that they were doing the Titans a favour by stopping their wrongdoings; instead, the Titans just hungered for a crime worth their time and effort.

"Penny for your thoughts?" a husky, female voice asked from behind him. He didn't need to turn; he knew exactly who it was. Sure enough, the girl stood next to him. Her face gave away nothing, as it always did.

"There's no action," he grumbled. His voice, too, had deepened, becoming more masculine as his companion's voice became more...effeminate. Seductive. It took a gargantuan effort not to swallow or blush. "We're running out of jobs."

"I suppose there's nothing that can be done about it right now," Raven answered, her reply clear. Her voice never stopped sending shivers down Nightwing's back. "They're afraid. Jump City is at peace."

Nightwing grumbled. His body itched for a fight to release some frustration. He drank what was left in the mug and stood up straight. "It doesn't seem right."

"Relax, Boy Blunder," she whispered in his ear.

After Trigon's defeat, she had undergone the most change than anyone on the team, or so Nightwing noted. She grew taller, as he did, and he was somewhat thankful that her head still only reached his shoulders. Her body became more defined – there were curves and flat places where there should be – all the right contours matching up and making her even more attractive. She had donned a white cloak that she still kept around her form, hiding her black leotard, yet she kept the hood down. Her hair had grown considerably. She was more talkative, more open. However, everyone knew that she couldn't just forget what she's been taught all her life, and that she couldn't just abandon her monotonous and impassive tone.

And now, she seemed more confident.

Starfire squealed as Nightwing accidentally dropped his mug, shattering it to a billion pieces on the floor. Raven had already pulled away. The two lovers on the couch still continued their bickering and gaming, barely looking up from the sound.

Raven sighed and used her powers to gather up the tiny pieces.

It was a normal day.

Until Nightwing's communicator beeped.


	2. Chapter 2

Raven cursed herself for being so reckless and utterly irrational as she trudged up towards her room. She was abnormally weak, considering that she just transported herself to the kitchen only minutes ago.

There was that sudden jolt of uneasiness when Nightwing answered his communicator and stepped out, leaving Raven to dispose of the remnants of his mug. She drowned out Starfire's ranting about making some sort of alien dish that no one would eat anyway.

Then the headache came.

The world warped and contorted around itself, and Raven had to lean against the nearest wall, a palm pressed against her forehead. She trudged forward, thankful that the doors slid open as soon as she set her hand upon the door. It shut promptly behind her.

She fell on her knees, trying to contain the bile rising up her throat while attempting to expel the pounding, sense-warping pain in her head.

**_he smelled nice like that smell better off dead_**

She groaned involuntarily before falling on her side on the floor, now clutching her head between two hands.

_Stop, _she thought. Even her own thoughts were weak against these voices invading her mind.

**_killing himself with all that coffee yes dead dead_**

Unbidden tears flowed from her eyes, even though she clenched them so hard they hurt.

The voices started a few weeks after the event that led to her father being expelled from her life. Or so she thought. She was still half demon, after all, and it seemed that the prophecy neglected to tell her what happened _if_ Trigon was defeated, because it was never anticipated.

They started as whispers. The darkness of the blood that flowed in her veins didn't lose its evil. She became more impulsive, her inhibitions becoming less over the past few years. It was a gradual change, but even as she consulted her emotions in Nevermore, they were of no help. No one could do anything against something so...biological. Half-demons weren't supposed to survive this long, and now it was catching up to her.

Soon, the voices would grow louder. The headaches would come more often...and she wouldn't be fit to fight alongside them.

Darkness ate at her, every day, and she hoped that no one would notice before the time comes that they absolutely needed to. There was still time to fix this, she hoped.

**_bad hoping bad terrible lies_**

She screamed – unaware that she did so both internally and in real life – to chase the voices away.

No, she would not believe them.

Her friends never lost hope. They had prevailed.

But if they hadn't...would she still be going through this?

A small knock interrupted her thoughts, and silenced the mocking laughs of the voices plaguing her. Her head still hurt, but that could be put aside for the moment.

She put her hood up, careful to hide her face – the red, bleary eyes and pink cheeks – in the shadows, despite the fact that her room was already dark enough. The early morning sunlight refused to enter her territory. Even the sun was afraid.

She pressed her palm against the lightweight, thin pad on the door, and it opened to reveal the tall frame of her leader. Her mouth set on a tight-lipped scowl.

"What do you want?" she snapped, unintentionally so. The man didn't seem to notice.

"Meeting in the common room in five minutes," he replied, his tone clipped. Something was bothering him, too. Raven got the sense that it was because of...Gotham. She tilted her head ever-so-slightly.

What could be so bothersome in Gotham that his thoughts ran prominently about it?


	3. Chapter 3

"Dude, what's up?" Changeling asked. It caught Raven by surprise; his voice had considerably become deeper, more masculine. It was disconcerting, especially since all the boys now towered over her, their muscles rippling underneath their uniforms. Cyborg looked particularly distressed, as if he had pulled out of a project all of a sudden.

"Commissioner Gordon has informed me of a major crime in Gotham," their leader started, "and he thought that it would be more of our...issue."

"And this would be...?" Terra asked, tightening her grip on her boyfriend's hand. It was still a shock to everyone that she came back, and not only did she fully express her...affections...for Changeling, she also seemed to be more dedicated to fighting crime, coming only second to Nightwing's own passion.

Nightwing clenched his fists, and said through clenched teeth the one thing that they were all dreading: "Slade."

The tension in the room rose considerably. The air of uneasiness and anxiety was almost palpable.

Raven felt her teammates' emotions magnifying her own, and she found herself shaking with both fear and anger at the same time.

Slade – the man who assisted her father and almost drove Nightwing insane. He had pushed Terra to become a statue. He had made Nightwing worry day in and day out, which made him more irritable, and thus affected the whole state of their team. They thought that that was in the past, that Slade _hopefully_ learned his lesson from dealing with the devil.

But they should have known better. They should have expected the worst when it came to the masked villain whose presence loomed over them daily, like a shadow that they can't get rid of.

Raven knew that this was a bad sign. Nightwing's communicator going off gave her bad vibes from the start. With Slade involved, who knew what could happen next? He had been involved with Trigon, which meant that he still had remnants of his influence. Certainly, that would make everything worse for Raven.

"Key spots in Gotham – Gotham Museum, Gotham Bank and Arkham – have been targeted recently, which has led the Commissioner and the Batman to believe that it's Slade behind all of it. He left behind a note for each time a heist was conducted, with an S-shaped blade pinning these notes to the wall."

"So why can't Batman do it?" Cyborg argued. He had every right to ask that, after all. Slade was...formidable. Cunning, like a snake, and ruthless like a lion. None of them were happy about this, and besides, Gotham wasn't their territory.

"He _can_, except Slade addressed those notes to him, which meant that he expects the Bat to make a move," Nightwing explained, sounding so logical even though none of this made sense to even him. Raven felt the turmoil building in him, and the emotions threatened to weaken her and make the voices return. "He personally asked us to assist him. Knowing Slade, he knows or has a clue of who the Batman really is. With knowledge like that, it's possible that he can take the whole world down. So, the Bat has asked me to participate and aid him in the mission. I called you guys here to tell you that I need back-up."

_To keep me sane_, Raven almost heard him say, even if his mask gave nothing away. Still, she could almost hear it in her mind. Nightwing's obsession with finding Slade could still return, and someone had to be there to help him and keep his sanity in check.

"So, who's willing to go?" he asked, trying to sound enthusiastic about it, but totally failing.

Even Starfire didn't raise her hand.

It seems that everyone had that particular line that they didn't want to cross.

"Friend Nightwing, I hope you understand," Starfire started, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. "None of us want to...to deal with this man. I think it is in everyone's interest to not let you help the Batman as well, for your sake and ours."

Nightwing gently shrugged the alien's hand off his shoulder. "I owe the guy. And...I need this. Surely, you would all understand. Since no one has volunteered, I'd have to pick one of you."

He surveyed them as they shifted uncomfortably.

Terra and Changeling were on the couch, looking at each other and holding hands like they would never be kept apart again. He didn't want to come between those two. If he chose Changeling, the guy would probably just irritate him to the point of insanity because of constant whining about being away from Terra. If he chose Terra, there was a chance that she would snap, since she knew how Slade was like and how abusive he was.

Cyborg seemed to be in deep thought. Nightwing knew that taking him away from the Tower for more than a few days would be...disastrous...for the half-man, half-robot's psyche. Besides, Cyborg was the Tower's security system on his own. To take him away would be to put the Tower in peril and vulnerable to attacks. There was no doubt that defeated villains would try to infiltrate their home once they knew the team's leader and bodyguard were gone.

Starfire had already expressed her discomfort on the issue. While she was a good fighter and a good friend, she would be too innocent for the streets of Gotham. She would easily break at the constant crime, and would want to be out there fighting it rather than lying low and sticking to their cover (whatever it would be, if they were even given one).

Raven seemed to be the only reasonable option. He allowed his gaze to linger on her for a little more. She looked troubled, yet only slightly so. It was normal for her to look so emotionless and impassive, as if it didn't affect her. As it was, they already had a mental link, which would help if he ever got out of control. He refused to linger on the fact that she was becoming his constant distraction; it must be that her presence is suddenly more...pronounced. She didn't seem too bothered by the situation at all.

"Well?" she prompted, her monotone voice dragging him back to reality. They were all looking at him expectantly now. Even through all those years of leadership, he still felt uneasy when they did this.

"You," he said, trying to sound casual about it. "Raven."

She opened her mouth to say something, but he started talking to drown her out. His decision was made. He was being selfish, not allowing her to refuse only because he wanted her by his side – for his sake, of course.

Then again, no one said that this leader thing was going to be easy.

Besides, he was allowed to have a little something sometimes, wasn't he?

"We're leaving tonight at eight. Start packing your bags. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can finish the mission."


	4. Chapter 4

Raven didn't walk out; she transported herself to her room. She wasn't going to walk out like a brat; she was going to disappear into the floor and leave before she could tear her leader to a million pieces.

**_yes tear him up yes blood_**

She was willing to accept that this was partly her fault for not telling him that she was currently in a bad psychological state to deal with the likes of a mission in Gotham, let alone Slade. As much as she hated to admit it, the man scared her to the extent that the very mention of his name almost sent her running.

Her head pounded as she paced across the room, but she ignored it, biting her thumb as she did so.

And why had Nightwing chose _her_, out of all people? She had a feeling that he would do that once his masked eyes settled on her, but she thought that that was a false intuition and he would take someone more to his tastes, like Starfire.

She quickly berated herself for thinking that.

Of course Nightwing wouldn't pick his partner in this mission for romance. No, he was their leader for a reason. Surely there was some rationality in how he picked her.

**_unforgivable he is kill him now before thing become worse yes prevent it_**

She could still feel the tension in the Tower. It didn't help that most of her team members were gathered in the common room, in the same floor as he room. Her defences against the voices weakened, and they grew stronger.

She marched out of her room and transported herself once again so that she was on the beach.

She sat on a dry rock and tried to calm herself.

The distance she put between her and those emotions helped a little.

The waves lapped at her feet, almost making her boots wet yet not quite being able to. The roaring ocean drowned out the voices completely once she focused on that sound, and the sensation of the waves crashing against the rocks.

"You know, the high tide is going to come in soon," Nightwing said beside her, almost scaring her out of her wits. She did, of course, try her best to hide her surprise. He always had a knack for scaring people, what with his whole new black get-up. At least he didn't look like a walking traffic light anymore.

"I know," Raven lied. Unlike Nightwing, she didn't make a habit of knowing things that no one really wants to know about.

A steady silence settled between them, interrupted only by the sounds of the sea.

"Are you okay with this?" he suddenly asked, interrupting the calm. Raven sighed heavily. She certainly wasn't. But if she tried to object, Nightwing would argue to the point that made her want to give up on the issue and just go with it.

"Do I have to be?" she asked back. His eyes glazed over her once again. Her body language said that she accepted defeat, yet her face gave nothing away.

"Just tell me if anything's wrong," he answered, almost pleading. She had been so distant, more so over these past few months. It was gradual, yet he was used to her just being _there_. Lately, she was more withdrawn. It was worse than when they were teenagers.

A miniscule twitch in her facial muscles indicated that he had hit a nerve.

"You never told me if you had any problems with Slade."

"I don't," she lied, again. It was becoming a bad habit, she noticed. "I'm fine."

He knew that she was lying right then. Something – call it intuition – brought him down here, where he found Raven drifting off. There was still that uneasy feeling settling in his gut, and he wasn't one to ignore that feeling like a fool. She had been, after all, haunted by Slade during the weeks leading up to Trigon's arrival. He could still remember the feeling of helplessness when she turned into a portal before his very eyes. He knew that she felt powerless against the things happening around her, and being a member of Teen Titans became the rope that pulled her out of that pit.

"Are you sure?"

Her back stiffened. "Leave me alone."

The voices were coming back, crowding for space in her mind. The worry lacing his voice flipped a switch that seemed to be a fuel for the voices.

**_take him make him yours ha ha how would his face look like_**

"You're mad at me. Just tell me why you don't want to go, and I'll...go alone."

Rage bubbled over her. He knew that she wouldn't let him go alone, especially when Slade was involved. Even if she didn't want to go, they both knew that their mental connection made her the best choice to keep him in check. Still, if they were to go on a mission, she doubted that she could be of any good help; the voices and her emotions were becoming harder and harder to control.

"You're a douche," she said, her voice rising as she did. She was standing precariously on a slippery rock, yet her boots kept her from losing her balance...as long as she stood still. "Damn it, Nightwing, stop giving me the guilt trip. You're the leader, whether I like it or not, and I have to follow your orders, whether I want to or not! Isn't that enough?!"

He knew that she was just covering up her frustration about _something_, but she wouldn't open up about it. He felt terrible; he must not have been there enough for her, and she probably didn't felt like he was a good-enough person to open up to. She probably felt so alone and confused, and no one was there to pull her out.

"I didn't want to give you the guilt trip. I just wanted you to know that you have a choice." As much as he wanted her by his side, he knew...that she probably needed some sort of security. God, he should have seen it before.

"You need me there, don't you?" she asked, nimbly stepping off the rock and moving forward so that she was looking up at him. He forced a grin on his face; she looked adorable sometimes when she tried to make herself look taller.

"I need you," he said, not thinking about what it would sound like until after he said it.

A light blush spread across Raven's face, but she turned around quickly before Nightwing could confirm it.

"I'll meet you at the rooftop later. Just tell me where we need to be and I can take us there. Just...leave me alone until then."


	5. Chapter 5

"You're _sure_ you guys are going to be alright?" Nightwing asked as he set his bags down at his feet, taking his place beside Raven and her luggage. For someone like her, he noticed, she certainly had a lot of things to take.

"We're going to be fine, man," Cyborg reassured him with a friendly chuckle. He tossed their leader a metal case, which felt heavy in Nightwing's arms once he caught it. Nightwing looked at the robot man questionably, and his friend only smiled. "Communicators and a new creation of mine that you absolutely _should not_ use until you're...say...on the verge of death."

"Oh, I hope that does not happen!" Starfire exclaimed, looking at the pair, who stood near the edge of the rooftop. Nightwing still had doubts if Raven was still in a bad mood; if so, he did not want to be standing there at all. "Return safely, friends!"

Terra winked at Raven, and she blushed as a response. The hooded girl lowered her head so that no one would see.

Earlier, as she was packing her bags, Terra had approached Raven. She knew that Raven felt...confused...around Nightwing, and used that to agitate her. Suffice to say, it didn't take long for Raven to give into Terra's request that she pack more clothes than she should, along with morning-after pills (which Raven was shocked to see that Terra had, but then, it didn't take a genius to guess how she and Changeling had such a solid relationship).

Raven further blushed at the thought of _why_ she would need those pills in the first place, but she quickly reined in her emotions so nothing else in the tower could explode.

"Bring us something back from Gotham!" Changeling said with a jaunty tone. "Probably Batman's cowl!"

Terra gave him a smack to the head, to which he complained more. This prompted Starfire to fuss over them, and Cyborg to tell Changeling to grow up.

Amidst all this, Nightwing managed to slip a small photo in Raven's hand. She looked at it, and saw an alley way full of badly-drawn, obscene graffiti. There was nothing that distinguished this alley from others; it was plain concrete, with fluttering posters and a lone bin situated near its mouth.

"That's where we need to go," he whispered in her ear, sending shivers across her shoulders; she was sure that it was his voice, and not the chilly night air. This must be his payback from when she whispered to him that morning.

_Honestly_, she thought, _some things never change_.

"Time to smile and wave," he continued, his baritone voice giving her weird sensations. He looped his arm around her shoulders, which almost made her go out of her mind.

_Focus, Raven. Focus on where you need to go._

"Bye, guys!" Nightwing exclaimed, getting the attention of the others while Raven formed a swirling vortex at their feet. She gripped the photo intensely, memorizing every detail, while also being aware of her surroundings. She didn't want the two of them scattered across different dimensions.

A mixture of goodbyes almost snapped her out of concentration, but she refused to let it.

Azar, if only she had her chakra gem in her forehead. It disappeared once she turned 18 – just about a year ago – and she realized that her control over her powers heightened to a point that she did not need to utter any incantations at all. However, that control was weakening day by day, and only the monks of Azar could give her that gem back. She still wondered sometimes as to why it disappeared, but...

No, she couldn't lose concentration now.

The familiar feeling of simply _being_ flooded her senses, almost making her lose focus as to where things were. She had to remember that Nightwing was also there with her, along with bags of luggage.

She closed her eyes and visualized the alleyway in her mind, down to every last detail.

It didn't take long until the putrid smells of an abandoned place in Gotham knocked her back into reality.

"Well," Nightwing said as she opened her eyes. He looked a little worse for wear, she noticed, and that was probably because she wasn't as used to transporting via demonic powers as she was. She'd been living with these powers her whole life, whether she wanted them or not. Then again, her sharp focus made them and their belongings come out in one piece, all in the right places, so she wasn't too worried. "Let's take a plane or something next time."

"Are we supposed to stay here or what?" she asked irritably, lifting her bags off the ground with her powers.

Then, a stinging pain travelled from her glowing black hand, and it made her drop the luggage.

The transportation took more out of her than she thought. If only she had less things...damn that annoying blonde earth-mover.

**_kill her make her eat dirt_**

She ignored the voices, and turned to Nightwing with a sigh. He was carrying all his bags in one hand already, the stupid, manly show-off.

"Hey, Boy Wonder," she called, chiding him with his past nickname. "You mind helping me out?"

He looked at her, assessing the situation.

She looked paler than he was, and that vortex thing wasn't a fun experience for him. He had done it once along with the others, and it hadn't been a fun time then, either. He had forgotten how suffocating the darkness can be. He shook those thoughts out of his head and deduced that she must have spent more energy than she planned she would.

He grinned as he took two more of her bags in his other hand, leaving her with a small backpack to carry.

"We won't be walking far," he reassured her, trying not to let his strain show. Damn, what did that girl put in these bags?

"Not my problem now," she retorted with a grin as they walked towards a small metal door. He dropped his bags, freeing one hand, and pressed the lock on the rusty metal doorknob.

A keypad appeared, barely visible. He typed in a 6-digit pin and a microphone was revealed through a sliding panel on the door.

"Hey, Alfred, it's Nightwing and Raven. We're here on the Batman's request," he said into it, enunciating each and every word carefully. "D'you mind letting us in?"

Raven tried to look nonchalant as the door slid back to reveal a wide, rectangular platform that seemed to float in a space with no floor. Nightwing grinned at her, seeing her veiled amazement through eyes hidden in the shadows. One can never expect a high-security passage behind a rusty old door labelled 'DISPOSAL UNIT' in a dirty, dingy, smelly alleyway.

He stepped on it and placed the bags upon the thick metal. Raven followed suit, not hesitating as to not seem like a foreigner to this type of technology. She noted that it was surprisingly stable, and it sped forward.

Caught unawares, she stumbled backwards as it moved, her heart catching in her throat as she stared at an open chasm beneath the platform.

But Nightwing anticipated this, and immediately placed an arm around her waist before she could plummet. He knew for a fact that no one can escape whatever lay down there. Not Superman, not Zatanna, not Captain Atom...not even the Batman himself.

Yet these thoughts were pushed aside as they noticed the closeness of their bodies. Nightwing felt the heat radiating off of her small, delicate body. She had a hand placed on his chest, and she could feel his heart beating erratically like her own.

**_take him now right now_**

The voices invaded her mind, and she could do nothing against what they made her do next. Her focus was scattered, her emotions riling up and beating against her mind. Her defences against those voices were so weak.

She lifted her face up – a miniscule act – so that her lips touched his soft ones. She could smell his aftershave, a smell so unique and nice and comforting on its own. She felt the hard muscles beneath her hands, covered by a few layers of whatever his black-and-blue uniform was made of.

Why was her heart beating so fast? Why did her hands itch to know what lay underneath that uniform? Why did she yearn to know how nice his kisses would be, or how soft his hair would feel once her fingers were intertwined in it?

**_smell nice probably tastes nice too_**

She tried to cut them off, to gain control of her body again, but found that she could not. She was being manipulated, and she did not have enough strength to fight against them, especially in this situation.

Especially not when his lips finally met hers, sending her mind flying out the proverbial window. Her powers lashed out, encasing them in a cocoon of heat and electricity that should have been uncomfortable, yet made their sensations more intense.

Their emotions mirrored each others' – confusion, fear, and an overwhelming passion that neither could find a reason for.

It took a while for Raven to realize that she was kissing him back, and that the platform beneath them started to get so hot that she could feel it even through her boots.

This sudden thought kicked her straight in the face and sent the voices away...momentarily. It allowed her to gain enough control and sense to push Nightwing back so that she could stand properly.

It took a lot more effort to get her powers under control again. She gladly observed that their belongings remained untouched, even though the platform beneath her looked burnt, a small, charred circle surrounding her feet.

They looked at each other, both flushed – Raven, her hood pulled back to reveal loose, straight locks of violet hair and wide, shocked eyes, and Nightwing, seeming amused and little breathless, a small, seemingly proud look on his face.

Azar, how she wanted to punch him.

"_Don't_ do that again," she hissed as the platform lurched to a stop in front of a silver door.

"A simple 'thank you' would have sufficed," he said with a grin as he faced the opening door, which revealed Alfred, an aged yet capable man in a suit.

"Welcome home, Master Richard," Alfred Pennyworth greeted with a bow as he stepped aside for the pair to enter into the cavernous, legendary Bat Cave. "I'll take your bags to your rooms. Please, make yourselves at home in the main house. I take it, sir, that Miss Raven knows of the Batman's...true...identity?"

"Don't you mean Bruce Wayne?" Raven answered, feeling left-out. It was obvious that these two were close, and she already felt like she was intruding even though she hasn't even technically set foot inside Wayne Manor, or the Bat Cave, for that matter. She nimbly stepped out of the platform, following Nightwing.

"Yes, of course, Master Bruce will arrive soon," the old man replied, not sounding a day over forty. She was impressed; how old is this guy?

"I'll give her a tour of the house," Nightwing said as he started up the floating metal staircase. Alfred answered with a simple 'yes, sir' behind them.

Raven, despite her worsening mood, followed suit with a small smile playing at the edges of her lips.

The Bat Cave was, indeed, enormous. Big screens flashing with who-knows-what were surely where Batman worked. Nearby, glass cases that held past uniforms were illuminated by the screens. Beside these glass monuments was a small bed and a metal table of medical equipment, probably for when Batman got wounded. On the other side, bits and pieces of wires and tools and whatnot were scattered around tables arranged in a semicircle – most likely, Batman inventing new things.

"And here I thought we'd be sliding up a metal pole."

"Don't make fun of my childhood," Nightwing retorted with a playful tone, a bigger smile on his lips, where the memory of Raven's kiss lingered.


	6. Chapter 6

_Author's note:_

_Thank you for all the reviews! Really, it made me so happy that I almost got a myocardial infarction. Keep 'em coming!_

_Raven: Get on with the fanfiction._

_me: But...I still need to thank them..._

_Raven: I. Don't. Care._

_me: *whimpers* Okay. I'll try to write faster next time.;A;_

Raven tried – she really did – but couldn't seem to get a decent conversation out of Nightwing. The awkwardness of their kiss was starting to settle in like a fog; an annoying, heavy fog. She barely even listened to him, or actually remembered the places which he pointed out. She'd probably just get lost anyway. For an empath, she was pretty susceptible to losing her way around places she wasn't familiar with.

"And this is the kitchen," he continued, pretending that he thought that she was listening. But her constant staring at _him_ proved to be impossible to ignore for any longer. He turned around and leaned on the smooth metal bench. She looked...normal. Her face showed nothing. "Is there something on my face?"

She scowled in response. She was tempted to put her hood up again, yet her arms remained crossed over her chest. "Your face is terrible enough as it is."

"Is that why you keep staring at me?"

Now the red tint on her cheeks became prominent, and Raven only blushed harder in embarrassment of being caught.

It wasn't hard to forget kisses that made her lose control.

There mere thought – the simple memory – of that feeling...

A loud crack made Nightwing lose his balance and Raven to gain control of her powers again.

The bench had snapped in two. Since Nightwing was balancing on it, he had not anticipated such a well-built piece of metal to break so easily with a single, out-of-control thought

"Stop," she warned as he walked towards her, intrigued.

He couldn't stop thinking about it; he knew that they couldn't just ignore that it happened. Uneasiness pooled in his chest. What if he read her wrong? Was he forcing her into another thing that she was reluctant to do?

"Stop what?" he asked with a small grin. He wondered if she could sense his anxiety with just being near her. God, he would never be able to measure up to her. He knew that she viewed it as a curse to be able to do so many things with a focused thought, and he could not blame her, but...she was powerful in a way that she can organize those thoughts and make them into reality.

**_here he comes again take him again_**

Her lower lip quivered slightly – the only indication, apart from the fading blush on her cheeks, that she felt anything at all.

**_make his heart beat out of his chest take it_**

He didn't see her hands clench and unclench at the effort of moderating his feelings and hers, and her attempts to shut the voices out. All of this was too soon; she had to regain energy again.

**_squeeze him until he bleeds_**

Her jaw tightened with the effort of keeping them out.

She would have to dig out her mirror again. She needed to go to Nevermore, she couldn't...stay.

"Being you," she muttered almost intelligibly, so silently that Nightwing almost didn't catch it. She mustered up the courage to look into his eyes – that is, those covered by his mask. "Nightwing, I –,"

"It's Robin."

But it wasn't Nightwing who interrupted her.

The Batman himself stood a good few feet behind them. She would not have been able to know that they arrived here safely were it not for the emotions she felt radiating from him. His face gave nothing away, except a small grimace at the claw marks running from his cheek bone to his jaw.

"Richard will _always_ be Robin in Gotham. I won't hear another word of him being...Nightwing."

A small smile danced on the caped crusader's lips, and Raven was almost blown back by how foreign it seemed. He was never known for showing any emotion other than stoicism. They were alike that way, and she found herself feeling a sort of kinship with the older man.

"Now, if you both change and present yourselves in my study in ten minutes, I'll brief you on the details of the mission."

Raven cursed as she looked at the multitude of clothes Terra stuffed in her bags.

Those clothes were too bright, or too casual, or simply not appropriate (really, how can leather lingerie be important in a mission that involves Slade?!). It infuriated her.

The mirror to Nevermore, at least, was now safely on her bed. All her anxiety about it being broken under all those clothes was expelled; that was one less thing to worry about.

She looked at it, wishing that she could visit her emotions to ask them what was going on, but she doubted that the meeting would last less than ten minutes. She still had the issue of knowing what looked 'presentable' for the great Bruce Wayne. She certainly did not want to expend any energy on looking for proper clothes, so she decided to go with a simple jeans-and-shirt combination. Thankfully, Terra had the hindsight to pack a simple black shirt.

She huffed, wondering why she didn't even pack any of her plain hoodies. Maybe Terra replaced them with flashy jackets and whatnot – she probably also had help from Starfire.

Damn those two.

A polite knock on the door made her hurry to pull on her boots.

She opened the door to an unmasked Richard Grayson. Beautiful green eyes stared back at her, but his face marred them – a clear picture of impatience.

"One minute until debriefing. You're cutting it close."

Raven huffed, even though she could feel her emotions bursting out again.

For Azar's sake, can't he stop being so perfect for _one second_?

She cleared her throat, and such thoughts. "Well? Are we going or not?"

He gave her another amused look, as if this was all just a game to him. Raven knew full well of how deceptively charming the man can be.

He turned and, as she seemed to always do, she followed in his footsteps like a shadow.


	7. Chapter 7

**Note**: I will be very busy for a while, so this will be the last post I will put up in the span of a few days. Please be patient with me~

The moon shone brightly in the night sky, and would have illuminated Bruce Wayne's home office with a light, ethereal glow through a wall-sized window, had it not been for the modern-looking spheres of light hanging from the walls lined with intricate, expensive wallpapers.

The owner of the manor – and the study – sat in a grand chair in front of a sleek, modern oak table, his fingers intertwined with each other, as if in prayer. He was unmasked, too. However, he still looked more superior and intimidating in a suit, despite being so dashing for a middle-aged man. The teammates suddenly felt inadequate – Raven more so than Nightwing – as they only wore simple civilian clothes.

Nightwing – _no_, Robin – sat in one of two chairs across from the great big Bat. He saw the gray roots showing just above Bruce' ears, yet he did not dare challenge the older man. Bruce was right when he said that Robin will always be Robin in Gotham; he was the first, after all.

"How's Tim these days?" he asked, trying to appear nonchalant while Raven settled uneasily into her chair. It wasn't everyday that they could sit in the finest chairs in the world, after all. Everything in this manor was close to priceless and had been bought with both money and intimidation.

"He's doing fine," Bruce answered. His voice never lost its regality, its holier-than-thou tone that he could never get rid of, even when he tried to appear caring or endearing. Robin knew how to read expressions well because of him. "I trust that your rooms are adequate?"

They both nodded.

Nightwing was shocked that nothing in his room has changed since his departure. He found old clothes, back from when he still lived here, and that old hidden compartment in the back of his cabinet where he kept memorabilia from when he started out as Robin. Heck, even that first broken bo staff (a result of a fight with the Joker) remained intact.

The man made a sound of approval and looked at them both with a serious expression on his face; gone was the semi-caring father figure, and now replaced with a stern, professional man on a mission. "I've done my part as a host. Now, we move on to business.

"Slade is back. There is no doubt about it. I know because he infiltrated a social gala I was attending as Bruce Wayne. He came and kept me distracted with civilians in need of help while he stole the Amaranth Gem. He came, yet again, two weeks ago, and stole the Staff of Tutankhamen. Both of these have high traces of magical energy and are closely related to...dimensions that are not this one. Both times, he has outsmarted me and almost fatally injured Tim. It seems that he was targeting Tim and I specifically, which has led me to believe that he may have an inkling of who is behind the Batman's cowl."

He seethed at the information. He knew Slade was smart, but smart enough to outsmart the Batman...? It was almost impossible. And if anything, Slade might also know that the Batman's weakness is his own secret identity. Tim had been in danger as well. This only strengthened the idea that he knew – or had an idea of – the Batman's true identity.

Raven opened her mouth to ask something, but Bruce held a hand up to signal her to hold whatever she had to say.

"You are wondering why I chose you to help me," he started, "and the answer came to me as simply as I will explain it to you: you know this villain. To add to that, he does not know Robin's true identity, let alone that Robin has turned himself into Nightwing. I _know_ he hasn't been around because there have been no signs of him in Jump City for a little over two years.

"Therefore, I propose that you two will go undercover under the guise of a young, elite, married couple. I have already built up some media excitement about making Richard the heir to Wayne Enterprises – not that I never intended you to be, of course – after coming back from a year-long trip, a new bride in tow. It will take a while for you to actually gain a reputation. Even so, you will join Tim in his patrols while I search for any signs of Slade. I'm sure he'll show up soon enough, seeing as his targets seem to be the high-profile events."

"So you're saying that he waits for a gathering before he steals something?" Nightwing asked, trying to keep his cool, yet fully unable to prevent himself from clenching the hard, wooden armrests. "With all due respect, Bruce, I'm sure that that isn't how Slade works. How can you be sure that it _is _him?"

A deadly silence ensued. There was a glaring contest, it seemed, between the two grown men. Raven brought her fingers up to her temple, trying to drown out the whispers of the voices and the boys' uneasiness and pride at the same time. She was honestly too tired to deal with all this.

"Calm down," she said, closing her eyes in vain. She felt the tension in the air lessen. "I'm sure Batman has his motives. However, the choice on our stay depends on my leader, sir. I am simply here to assist him."

And it was all she intended to do. That kiss was never planned. She set her mind on forgetting it as best as she could. Maybe the best course of action would be to stop being so personal and start being more professional, like Batman. Besides, wasn't Nightwing supposed to be the one telling her that?

She opened her eyes to a sighing Nightwing. It added years to his face, and suddenly, the man looked as tired as his mentor.

"Fine," he said, surrendering. "We'll see what happens in a few weeks."

_Weeks_?! Raven cursed internally, but remained her calm composure. She couldn't even last a day without jumping on her leader – her best guy friend – and making everything awkward. He said that if they arrived early, the earlier they could get on with it and finish the thing. He said nothing about _it_ going on for _weeks_.

"Wouldn't Slade recognise me?" she piped up, finally seeing the flaw in Batman's plans. To this, the man smiled.

"I have asked Zatanna to obtain a spell to alter your appearance," he replied, as if asking his famous super-powered friends for favours while each one of them were scattered all over the globe was the easiest thing in the world. "The spell and its details have been brought to your room by Alfred."

Batman stood up, and taking this as a signal, the pair did so as well. They shook hands, small, polite smiles on their faces. Raven knew that these two men were good at hiding how they felt, but they weren't good enough to control these emotions.

They weren't as skilled at being cold as she was; not even Batman can suppress his feelings. Somehow, this lightened her mood.

Nightwing stepped out of the room and held the door open for her as she followed him outside.

There was a flash of anxiety in his eyes – just a flash – before it was gone with the confidence of a player. He suddenly put his arm around her shoulders affectionately, as if nothing ever happened.

As if they were back to normal.

"I'll walk you back to your room," he said, affectionately nuzzling his face into her hair. She shivered and tried to back away, but he held her firmly beside him. This wasn't new behaviour, of course – whenever he wanted to make up for something, he was always uncharacteristically affectionate.

"I didn't expect it to be such a long mission," he finally said, confirming her suspicions.

She could only sigh; he _knew_ that she was going to let it go. He timed it perfectly, of course – he anticipated her fatigue, and even though he felt bad for exploiting it, he didn't want to be obliterated by her anger. She broke a titanium table in half. Her powers were growing exponentially. He didn't doubt her control. If anything, she was the master at that. No, he doubted what the future would bring. He knew for a fact that any power that requires extreme focus would have some sort of blowback. Not that he was certain it would make Raven go crazy. He trusted in the fact that she had no reason to be.

"Well, I'm in it now, so..." she replied, thankfully not blowing anything up. They were almost to her room. Only a few more steps...

She'd be rid of him and, finally, be able to go to Nevermore.

He'd miss the warmth of her body and the familiar, comforting scent she carried around with her.

"Are you sure you're okay with...with posing as a married couple?" he asked, slackening his grip around her so that she could move forward and open the door.

"We're on a mission," she replied, anxious to get away from him entirely. The sooner, the better. "We should focus on that."

He almost retaliated with a quick response, but stopped himself just in time. A small frown formed on his face, and he grasped Raven's arm.

"You were about to say something earlier," he stated.

"I'm fine," she lied, even more brilliantly than she did the last time.

But he knew that she was lying. He let it go before; he knew that he let her go too often. He ignored her lies and forced himself to believe that they were true.

He wasn't going to do that again.

"You're uncomfortable. Are you in any pain?"

She shook her head, a small, sad smile on her face. "There's no cure for the kind of pain I have, _Robin_." Her expression switched to annoyance as easily as that gentle demeanour did. She had a knack for altering her moods at will; he reminded himself that this was what she was always trained to do.

He let go of her, and as she shut the door in his face, he wondered what he could have found out if he pried a little bit more into her business.

_REVIEW REPLY TIME~!_

_Guest (who commented on chapter 6): Yeah, I changed Nightwing/Robin's eye color, sorry, I'm always confused between the eye colors of Dick and Tim. And as for that Batman thing, erm, this will clear up soon. Maybe. _

_Xaphrin: I love you._


	8. Chapter 8

**Note: **"I'm baaaaaack~!"

She landed on the ground in Nevermore with a thud. She rubbed her bottom, wondering if that would hurt later. Her emotions slowly gathered around her as she dusted herself off.

Then, she felt it – something wrong in the air. Something…off.

It was a sickening feeling that made her want to throw up and run away at the same time. She knew that she should be afraid, and sick, and just about everything that could go wrong in one's body.

"They are advancing," Knowledge pointed out. Her glasses slipped down her slender nose, and she pushed it back up out of sheer habit. "Our defences are weakening."

Raven nodded grimly as she observed her different emotions surrounding her. They all looked forlorn and crestfallen. Even Happiness seemed less than vibrant today. Hell, Fear looked worse for wear and looked like she was about to fall apart at any second. Courage seemed downright disheartened. Hope seemed to have…gotten shorter.

She was grateful for having this much control over her emotions. They fought off the insanity – the voices – threatening to take over her. They were as tired as she was.

All of them had some black tinge to their cloaks, as if they had waded through a sea of darkness and came back scathed and bruised. Hope's usually pure white cloak looked grey, and her face was that of disappointment.

On that note, Disappointment seemed to have grown taller than the rest.

"The voices are unrelenting," Knowledge continued on. "The darkness is ever-growing. Raven, if we don't hold them back…"

The statement remained unfinished, the uncertainty hanging over their heads like a grim cloud.

"At least you kissed _that man_!" Happiness beamed, even though her wide smile wasn't quite as wide as it used to be. "That made me stronger for a while!"

"It made _me_ stronger, too," Courage piped up while whittling some stick into a sharp point. "You finally had the guts to hit on him, huh?"

Fear cowered behind Knowledge. "But what if he doesn't like us?"

"He's going to leave us," Disappointment added, sounding so certain. Raven winced.

She looked around for a while, noticing something was missing.

"Where's Rage?" she asked, looking for any sign of a red cloak, darkened or not.

Sure enough, a loud, rambunctious voice reached them, growing louder as the distance between them and Raven's circle of emotions lessened. Oddly, however, hers was mixed with others. As Rage came into view, so did a few other emotions that Raven had never seen before. She raised an eyebrow at Knowledge, who – as she tended to do – gave her a knowing smile.

"That's Love," she said, pointing to a lavender-cloaked Raven. Love smiled and waved, seeming both like Happiness and Courage at the same time – her smile was unbelievably wide, yet there was a sort of unbridled confidence behind her jovial expression. Raven was unsure of how that was possible, and shook her head. Where had she gotten _that_ emotion from?

"Here's Lust," Knowledge continued, putting a hand on the shoulder of a maroon-cloaked Raven this time. Lust grinned at her; she was the only one not wearing her hood up, apart from the original Raven, and she had somewhat tighter-fitting clothes.

"And this," Knowledge seemed to add with venom in her voice, "is Stupidity."

A ditzy-looking brown-cloaked Raven stumbled forward as Knowledge patted her none-too-gently on the back. Stupidity mumbled something that sounded like what Changeling would say, but Raven chose to ignore it. She had more important matters to discuss with her them, and she didn't want to be unlucky enough to be these new emotions' welcoming committee.

"A 'thank you' would have sufficed," Rage seethed as she leant against a rock. Her cloak, Raven noticed, was as pure, unadulterated red as ever. "I had to drag these out of the pit. Do you know how hard that is?! This chick" – she pointed an accusing finger at the original – "doesn't even know _what_ she feels, so I had to wade through all that gunk to get these fucking guys, and I get no 'thank you' at all?!"

"Thank you," Raven said curtly. Rage opened her mouth to say something else, but shut it like a clam. Raven was serious, and she needed to get to the point. She needed a good night's rest after this.

"I don't even want to know how these three came about," she started, "and tomorrow, maybe, I'll be friendlier. But right now, I want to know how the…the darkness…is coming along. Do we have any progress at all?"

They all looked at each other, then at Knowledge, who sighed. Raven looked expectantly at her, who seemed to be more talkative than ever. "It's complicated. The battles are more intense now; they have gotten stronger, somehow. But when you kissed Nightwing, it gave all of us strength – including the voices. We all seem to be taking strength from your actions involving him. Honestly, a single touch, a single glance…anything could decide everything. We have found ourselves at an impasse."

Raven sighed and put her fingers to her face, pinching the bridge of her nose in annoyance.

_Okay_, she thought, trying to calm down. _Plan. I need a plan._

She was stuck with Nightwing for a good few weeks; maybe even a month. That wasn't doing her any good. Both her emotions and the darkness gained their strength from mere interactions with him. She could pull out now, but then she worried for Nightwing. She knew him to be somewhat obsessive over things that caught his attention, and this attention had a vice-like grip that even Raven found hard to pry open. It wasn't fair for him to be abandoned by her.

But it wasn't fair for her to risk her sanity and their safety by being unstable like this. What if Slade suddenly engaged in a fight? What about those patrols around Gotham that Batman had instructed them to take with the current Robin, Tim? What would she do then?

"I advise to ride it out for a day or two," Knowledge suddenly piped up. Her emotions, of course, had an inkling of what she was thinking about. "If things get worse by the day after tomorrow..."

Raven felt sick. She was his best friend – kiss or not – and he depended on her for this reason, and for the fact that she may be the only one who can keep him sane and _together_. If she didn't do that, the team would be in great danger of disbanding with no hope of getting together again. "How am I going to tell him that we should pull out, then? _Batman_ asked him to do this. _Batman_ put all this effort into preparing for this mission. Guys, c'mon! This guy is Nightwing's father, or at least, their relationship seems like that, even though we all know they're not related by blood. Still, Nightwing adores that guy, no matter how much he denies it..."

"So you're saying that Nightwing doesn't have the guts to stand up to Bruce Wayne?" Courage asked with a sneer. "You're saying that he won't even refuse this mission, even if you're in danger?"

Rage only growled; maybe that was her way of approving of Courage's statement. No one ever knew, though, so they all ignored her.

"But if he loves you, even as a friend," Love interjected, "he'll listen to _you_. He _must_ care about your safety and wellbeing! Didn't he ask _before_ we came to Gotham if we were going to be okay?"

Raven winced. "That was before...before _that_ happened."

"Kisses will lead to something more...eventually," Lust said, her breathy, seductive voice entirely new and foreign to Raven. She blushed at the thought of what 'something more' is.

Stupidity just picked her nose, looked at Raven dumbly, shrugged and said, "I'm confused."

_You don't say_, Raven added in her mind. Knowledge, Courage and Rage all rolled their eyes.

"I came here to escape a headache, and all of you are giving me an even bigger one," she groaned, rubbing the sides of her temples. She had been frowning for far too long. She let out a deep breath that she didn't know she was holding, and for a moment, the air cleared as she intended it to. She didn't want a crowded mind; she needed a clear one. "Look, we'll find a way to get through this. Knowledge is right – we'll stick it out for a few days for Nightwing's sake. We don't want to make the Titans look like wimps in front of Batman. If the darkness advances further by that time..."

"There are a lot of things that can result from that, actually," Knowledge told her. "Either we will all be compressed and easier to control, or the darkness will make you revert to an evil state and get rid of all your morals, or your mind will simply shut down in an attempt to stabilize this...maybe putting you in a coma until the darkness here is vanquished."

"All the more reason why we all need to kick its ass," Courage added with a nod.

"I hate invaders," Rage grumbled, kicking a rock and barely suppressing a wince. They all felt a slight pain on their toes, but chose to ignore it.

"F-fighting the d-d-darkness is s-s-scary, Raven," Fear said, her weak voice finally being heard. As always, Raven gave her a small, reassuring smile; this time, however, Fear only cowered behind Knowledge even more.

"The bad just comes before the good most of the time," Hope reassured Fear further, putting a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Fear, it's alright, as long as we all fight."

"Maybe it's all just bad," Disappointment muttered.

Raven groaned before the others could add their opinions. She came here for reprieve, to gather her thoughts and form a plan. Yet the only plan she had still put her and everyone she knew in danger. Aside from that, there were these new emotions that seemed to be triggered by Nightwing's presence.

Damn it. Damn it all to the nine levels of hell and back.

She closed her eyes, willing herself out of that barren place.

She landed with a soft thud on the bed, mirror in one hand and the other splayed out on a pillow. She found herself staring at a blank wall. The lights remained closed; the moon provided enough illumination tonight.

Kicking off her boots and removing her uniform from her body, she fished out a pair of starry pyjamas and put them on. She never remembered any such clothing, but she had to admire Terra for the comfortable clothes.

She just barely managed to drag herself to a proper sleeping position on the bed before collapsing into a deep sleep.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_Review Reply Time~!_

_The One: Yes, I try to stay as close to canon as I can for the same reasons. You'll notice (maybe) that I put Tim instead of Jason, which implies that this is set AFTER Jason's reincarnation as the Red Hood, which will hopefully clear up the Batman thing a little more later on._

_Xaphrin: I don't want to freak you out, but I am loving you right now._

_Other people: Y'all are giving me a myocardial infarction with these good responses. ;A; *tears of joy*_


	9. Chapter 9

Poke.

Raven squirmed in her sleep. Nightwing grinned and poked her shoulder again.

She didn't budge.

Poke. Poke. Poke.

"Stop doing that unless you want your fingers stuck in your innards, being slowly digested as you die a horrible death from blood loss and me squeezing your body like a sponge."

"I don't mind you squeezing me like that," Nightwing whispered in her ear, making her bolt upright and smack her forehead into his. She let out a wince and held her forehead, a more than annoyed look on her face. Nightwing made a note of how adorable she would have been if she didn't look so dangerous and in the mood for a good kill.

"Okay, first of all, what the _hell_ are you doing?" she asked, trying to control her temper and her tone of voice to its usual bored, calm monotone. She wasn't as patient with people without her early morning tea, and luckily, Nightwing had put it on her ornate bedside table before he decided to mess with her. He didn't fail to notice that a laminated piece of paper that spouted some garbage was on the table too, yet it was untouched. That was probably the spell Bruce was talking about.

An uncontrollable pout came to his lips. "I woke you up before you started drooling on the pillows. They could sell for a few thousand, you know..."

She scowled at him, and was tempted to throw the pillow at his smug face. He knew that she wasn't a big fan of all things fancy. Being here set her on edge already, it seemed. Still, he couldn't help but notice the small glance she shot at the place where her head rested a few minutes ago, and the way she smiled a little at how she didn't drool. She was too perfect for that, he noted in his mind.

Maybe they were both tired, or maybe Nightwing was tired of being her leader and not her friend. Not plain old Richard, if that was even possible.

"Second of all," she said as she glared at him, mug in her hands and knees pulled against her chest. He sat on the edge of her bed beside her, and she wasn't in the mood to deal with him so early in the morning. "Why did you choose to wake me up at...what time is it, 6...7 AM?"

He chuckled. "You never wake up past seven in the morning before, so I thought you'd be pretty pissed if I let you break that streak. It's only 6:30."

Sure enough, the sun had barely peeked through the heavy clouds already settling Gotham. The town seemed to be in a perpetual state of gloominess. Raven didn't wonder why Batman and his underlings always had that type of air around them – all gloomy and dark. The city rubbed off on the people that lived in it, and as much time as Nightwing spent away from it, that darkness still clung onto him like a stubborn Changeling whenever he was with Terra.

Raven was both glad and envious of Nightwing. He didn't have the darkness that she carried. He didn't have the constant threat of killing his friends looming over his shoulder, waiting for the right, weak moment to take over and make him do all kinds of unspeakable things that he'd probably make himself regret over and over.

"You're a douche," she said, trying to shake these thoughts from her mind. Of course no one would want her predicament. Hell, no one would even want to live with her. She had distanced herself from her friends to make them see how bad things can get, and how bad she didn't want them to know it. It wasn't that she didn't trust them; she didn't trust herself to protect them from her.

What a terrible way to start a morning. At least she wasn't awake enough to hear the voices. She wasn't awake enough for her powers to kick in.

Although that was changing, because the longer Nightwing spent with her, the more aware she was of him.

"And yet, I made sure that Alfred brewed you tea the way you always take it. I get no word of thanks and _I'm_ the douche?"

She let herself grin, just a little.

"You are for asking for my gratitude," she replied after sipping her tea. He was right, though; it was like drinking the tea from home. "Being humble isn't your strong suit, Robin."

She knew it ruffled his feathers. "I'm not Robin anymore. Tim is."

"Your _mentor_ doesn't seem to think so," she retorted, feeling in control of the situation now. Yes, maybe this was better, to keep him antagonized so he wouldn't seek more closeness. It was better for both of them; she was sure he wouldn't want to deal with whatever type of impending demonic doom she might unleash upon them all. That way, his emotions wouldn't get in the way if she went crazy and they had to put her...down.

Like a goddamn dog.

Maybe that's what she deserved, after all.

A sob threatened to escape her, but she washed it down with more tea, even though it scalded her tongue. She didn't find enough 'care' left in her to notice the stinging pain in her mouth.

"He has a big heart," he found himself saying. He thought that if he opened up to him, then she would do the same. "I guess that rubbed off on me." He let out a breath of exasperation. If he needed to be all sappy to get to her, fine. "Now tell me why you're so stressed all the time."

"Why would you say that I'm stressed?" she asked, trying to control the trembling lower lip by sipping even more of her tea as calmly as she could. She wouldn't give in to him that easily.

"Well, yesterday, your shoulders were a little slumped, but that was probably fatigue. However, yesterday before we left, you dropped your tea and were not even upset about it. The day before that, you did not go out of your room, not even once. You did that last week, and the week before that. When anyone tells you that we're going for pizza or just simply going out, you say that you're looking into something and will join us some other time. You're even worse than Cyborg – at least he goes out with us. Today you stepped onto the roof with your left foot, not your right. You walked to the common room yesterday instead of just transporting yourself there, which meant that you needed the walk to think about something. You've been forgetting to wear your belt. You've also been reaching for your favourite mug with your left hand, not your right. You're starting to favour your left hand to turn the page, and just now you're drinking your tea faster than normal.

"You haven't even noticed the spell that Batman gave you. You're referring to me as Robin more. You haven't made some smart comment about how, in the past, I looked like a walking traffic light. You haven't made any indication of noticing any changes, really. Your attention span is waning. You whispered in my ear. You barely say a word to anyone about anything. Tell me that that is normal behaviour, and I most likely won't believe you."

She contemplated on either dumping the tea on him or trying to defend herself – neither looked promising. Her temper was calmed by the tea, but her awareness wasn't. She was fully aware that he seemed to notice things that not even she did.

"You'll always be Boy Blunder to me, hun," she found herself saying into her tea. She didn't dare look at Nightwing; she'd break. "The image of you in a traffic light spandex is just too precious to let go of, you see. I'm sure our host would be so kind as to let me see you in that at a much younger age..."

He chuckled mirthlessly. "Ha ha, funny. But you'll have to tell me about whatever's troubling you, Raven. I'm your friend before I'm your leader. I can't do that if you won't even look me in the eye."

She scowled, gathered up her wits and did what he told her she didn't do. Azar, his eyes were so blue that she thought she was looking into the colour of the sea.

Instantly, the voices broke out of their prison in her mind, engaging battle with her once again. She winced without meaning to; the sudden rush of things happening in her head made her woozy.

He reached out and held her steady. He took the mug out of her hands and let her head rest against his chest. God, she was so fragile sometimes. He let his arm wrap around her slim waist and used the other hand to keep her head still.

To her credit, she didn't even notice. She was pulled back inside her mind for a moment – just a single moment – and that was all she needed to see before panicking. The darkness was so big and foreboding...and it held her face. The craziness that her emotions were trying to hold back looked so much like her; it looked so normal, were it not for the big, toothy grin that screamed 'insane', not to mention that that grin showed rows upon rows of fanged teeth.

When she got dragged back into reality, her heart was beating hard against her chest and her muscles were clenched so tightly that she thought she was going to curl into a ball and stay that way forever.

Tears welled up into her eyes at the idea that it was getting stronger every day.

A window cracked and broke, its pieces tinkling to the ground like strangled wind chimes. Neither of them seemed to make a move to stop Raven from breaking anything else by accident.

Suddenly, she didn't care that they were both in pyjamas. She didn't care that it was so out of line for personal feelings to get in the way, especially during a mission.

Hell, she didn't even care if she broke every single thing in this manor if it came to that.

She just needed someone. As much as she hated to admit it – before, now and forever – Nightwing was always there. He had always been there. The only strong thing in her life wasn't herself, but it was him; it was he that she clung onto in a desperate attempt to save herself.

That was true up to today.

"I'm scared," she said, her jaded voice sending sharp blades of pain into Nightwing's heart – no, he was Richard now. He was her friend. His grip on her tightened, as if that would stop her from breaking in front of him. He had this urge to drive away anything that made her scared; the last time she sounded so frightened was before Trigon's rise to power. He had driven that away, he had come to hell for her and back. He would do that again if only she told him what it was he needed to fight.

"Is it the mission?" he asked, worry lacing his voice. He didn't want to back out now that they've arrived, but if Slade was making Raven scared...well, he'd have to deal with Bruce's wrath or whatever. "Is it Slade? Do you want us to pull out?"

"It's me," she muttered into his solid chest. Even it was more stable than she was right now. Damn, she hated being weak like this; yet there was nothing else that could be done about it. She needed to warn him, and she knew that he wasn't going to leave her alone if she didn't give him a clue. "It's in me."

A light bulb exploded over their heads, barely missing them, their pieces landing on the space behind Nightwing.

What was she saying? He wouldn't understand. She knew that he felt the need to do _something_. He felt powerless if he couldn't do anything. His nerves were affecting her, pushing her to the limit. She needed him to calm down, at least for the moment. They'd deal with this later. They didn't have a choice.

"I'm...going to kill you all," she admitted with morbid fascination at the truth.

His grip only tightened on her, so much so that she almost couldn't breathe. "I'll keep you safe. Even if it has to be from yourself. I'll do it."

He'll do anything.

She could feel what he felt; his feelings were so strong.

She wouldn't – couldn't – let her believe that he could feel those kinds of things for her.

She didn't deserve it.

She didn't even deserve holding him like this, clinging onto him for dear life. She was being selfish; she knew that she was going to let go – she had to. But she wanted him here. He was the only one who could have any idea what it felt like to deal with those dark things lingering in the back of her head, now trying to come to light and consciousness. Damn it. She had no one to turn to, not now.

**_Would you look at that, our little bird is scared!_**

The clarity of the darkness' voices shocked her into fear. A lamp and the wardrobe exploded, sending even more things for Alfred to clean up. It was a good thing, it seemed, that she hadn't fully unpacked yet.

They sounded so clear, so mocking...it sounded like a million agonized, terrified voices merging into one, layers and layers of it reaching her thoughts.

Nightwing could feel anxiety build within his gut, and he knew that it was his connection to Raven that made him feel that way. She was trembling, ever-so-slightly, against him. Was there something going on in her head? Would it be right to say something now?

"Raven," he said, pulling back a little to be able to tilt her face up to his with a careful manoeuvring of her chin with his finger. "Raven, look at me."

Her eyes were red with invisible tears, her lower lip trembled as if she was about to break into sobs, and her skin was gradually going paler. It took a few, long seconds before she looked him in the eye.

"Raven. Focus." He needed to make her do that. She was scared, and she felt alone – that much Nightwing could tell. How long has she felt that way? How long has she kept this from him...whatever it was? She said that it was 'inside' her. What could that mean? Was she possessed? Was there some form of alien ailment that she contracted from Starfire's force-fed dishes that made her act this way?

"Richard," she whispered, finally saying his name out loud – the one thing that only she knew, that only she could know. It was one of the many secrets between them that made him feel as if she was the only person in the world who could support him. It was the least he could do to be there for her. "Make them go away...please...make them go away..."

Her hands flew to her ears, trying to block out the mocking laughs and taunts and suggestions on how to kill them, kill them all. Something even bigger exploded, somewhere in the manor. Bruce and Alfred would be even more worried than they already were – Nightwing knew that they didn't approve of her being here in the first place.

He was at loss – what _could_ he do? What could he possibly do to divert enough of Raven's focus from whatever it was that was plaguing her?

He was panicked.

He had no control.

He had to do _something_. Anything.

White, shaking hands reached out to touch ashen cheeks with a firm grip.

There was no hesitation, no thought or rationality to what he did. He was known for jumping head-first into whatever choice came up just to save someone. He didn't care if the one who told him that these types of actions had dangerous consequences, that getting too attached to team members would lead to his total destruction and derailment.

Her lips were soft, and she tasted like her tea.

He didn't mind.

Her hands dropped, relaxing, before instantly reaching out to entangle themselves into his hair, pulling him into a deeper, more intimate kiss.

The air got hotter, electrified, and neither of them were sure if it was Raven's powers going haywire again, or if it was their own skin, tingling with the anticipation for each other.

Raven only knew his kiss, his hands, roaming over her body. The voices were chased away, replaced by emotions that she should have ignored and stopped before things got too out-of-hand. These emotions made her heart swell and her skin heat up.

There was a loud crack, but that did nothing to dissuade the two. There was a moment when they broke apart, only to dive in again, this time going further.

The head rest cracked in two, and the bed fell with a deafening thud on the ground, cracking the smooth oak tiles. The sheer force of it hitting the floor made them jolt apart from each other, as if shocked at what they had done.

Pieces of wood lay embedded in the walls. Glass lay on the floor, glinting against the morning sun. Her luggage was burnt to a crisp – every single one. The air around them grew colder the longer they stayed apart from each other.

She grimaced at the sight, and her eyes instantly sought out her mirror – thankfully, it was on the bedside table, which was oddly left untouched. She frowned, and upon closer inspection, saw that there was a laminated piece of paper that seemed to hold Zatanna's spell for her to be able to alter her appearance. Maybe Zatanna's magic kept that table intact. Everything else seemed to be broken; even the ceiling was cracked.

There was too much going on inside her. Too many things communicated through that searing kiss, yet these things were not said out loud. Her body still ached for him, and she felt a deeper _thing_ that told her that he felt the same. She scowled at him, throwing her hands up in frustration with a grunt – there was so much left over. She had to find some way to vent her annoyance at herself for letting this happen; hell, for enjoying it.

"Do you see now?!" she asked in a tone that bordered on rage. He was just still stunned from everything – God, why had he even done that...? – yet her rage set fire to his own. "For Pete's sake, Richard, look at what you made me do! Are you that low to take advantage of me at such a weak state? Damn it!"

She screamed at herself, too. She shouldn't be doing this. She should be thanking him for keeping the voices at bay, for keeping her sane. He had every right to shout back at her, to retort with one of his many witty comments that she didn't doubt he made flashcards of every night.

The crack on the floor widened.

"I mean, look at my things! They're all gone! What am I supposed to do, fight Slade in star-spangled pyjamas?! Jesus H. Christ, you _knew_ that I'm not allowed to do these things, much less _feel_ these things, and then you come sauntering in with your almighty air –,"

"What 'things' do you feel, Raven?" he asked, his eyes never leaving her. He was still amazed at how quickly her moods changed – from vulnerable and scared to furious and murderous. Then again, maybe he'd had a hand at that this time. Now they wouldn't be able to deny the fact that they _did_ feel something. He just wondered if he felt it more than she did.

"I'm pissed off, _Robin_," she grunted again, and this time, instead of letting her powers go berserk in the room, she used them to move the debris out of her way so she could walk out of the room. At least she managed to stop herself from raising her voice again. "Leave me alone already. You've got your answer."

What she wouldn't do to forget what just happened.

What she wouldn't do to forget what she felt.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxx

_Review Reply Time~_

_TheBansheeQueen: Well, I'm always glad to lure others into this ship. ;) xD_

_Xaphrin: I'll try to be more articulate next time. :)_

_The One: Thank you~ Hopefully, my busy schedule last week and this week isn't interfering with the quality of my writing so far? But if it is, let me know. ;)_


	10. Chapter 10 (preview)

**A/N: **Since I'm *this close* to having writer's block AND my good mood is rolling in (slowly, but it's getting there), I'll put up a draft/preview/test run of chapter 10. Hope y'all enjoy!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxx

The doorbell rang, and Raven didn't even notice Alfred stop fussing over her to answer it.

She and Nightwing were intentionally being kept apart by Batman, by her request. She didn't say what happened, of course; she just disclosed that they had an argument (well, a one-sided one), that she wasn't really a morning person (total lie, but believable), and that they needed some time apart from each other to cool down. Of course, Bruce Wayne was happy to oblige, as was Tim, to take the 'prodigal son' out into the public. Well, at least it served their purpose to get him some publicity. Soon, they'd have to force her out, too.

Before, she didn't exactly care about pretending to be Nightwing's fiancée, but now...

She put a clamp over her emotions and her facial expression before Alfred could come back to notice the slightest change over her cool demeanour. No doubt that the poor butler had a lot of work cut out for him; the damage she did wasn't confined to the room, but to the rooms around it as well.

The guest rooms at either side were blown to smithereens, feathers of pillows and springs from beds coming out to get a glimpse at a new day. The room below held the water heater, and the loud crash before was it exploding and sending hot water into the small room it was confined in. Above the room was the roof, and only a few tiles missing – it could be easily fixed for appearances.

They had to give her a room on the opposite wing which, annoyingly, was a few doors down from Nightwing's. She offered her help to Alfred, but he simply ushered her away and told her that no guest of Bruce Wayne will have to do housework. She tried continuously to help the older man, but she was rejected every time to the point that she felt like a nuisance.

Just as long as no one inspects the house from the inside, they wouldn't even suspect Raven being there at all.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxx

_Review Reply Time~!_

_TheBansheeQueen: Haha, I'm glad it didn't seem forced. I was going to put something else in, but then I remembered that this is a romance fanfic, not a purely drama one; logic - there must be some kisses here and there. ;)_

_Xaphrin: Thank you~! I was honestly very uneasy about that chapter, and I was anxiously waiting for reviews to see if I should change it or not. I hope this little taste of Chapter 10 will sate your hunger for now! :D (haha, get it? 'cause you used "devour" and - okay. *goes away and stops bothering you)_

_AwkwardEyelinedAsian: I'll try my best to live up to that! :)_


	11. Chapter 10 (full)

The doorbell rang, and Raven didn't even notice Alfred stop fussing over her to answer it.

She and Nightwing were intentionally being kept apart by Batman, by her request. She didn't say what happened, of course; she just disclosed that they had an argument (well, a one-sided one), that she wasn't really a morning person (total lie, but believable), and that they needed some time apart from each other to cool down. Of course, Bruce Wayne was happy to oblige, as was Tim, to take the 'prodigal son' out into the public. Well, at least it served their purpose to get him some publicity. Soon, they'd have to force her out, too.

Before, she didn't exactly care about pretending to be Nightwing's fiancée, but now...

She put a clamp over her emotions and her facial expression before Alfred could come back to notice the slightest change over her cool demeanour. No doubt that the poor butler had a lot of work cut out for him; the damage she did wasn't confined to the room, but to the rooms around it as well.

The guest rooms at either side were blown to smithereens, feathers of pillows and springs from beds coming out to get a glimpse at a new day. The room below held the water heater, and the loud crash before was it exploding and sending hot water into the small room it was confined in. Above the room was the roof, and only a few tiles missing – it could be easily fixed for appearances.

They had to give her a room on the opposite wing which, annoyingly, was a few doors down from Nightwing's. She offered her help to Alfred, but he simply ushered her away and told her that no guest of Bruce Wayne will have to do housework. She tried continuously to help the older man, but she was rejected every time to the point that she felt like a nuisance.

Just as long as no one inspects the house from the inside, they wouldn't even suspect Raven being there at all.

Anyway, she had the spell from Zatanna down pat. It was pretty easy, but the disguise made her a little uncomfortable. It made her hair straighter, shinier, and darker to a shade that was almost black. The colour of her eyes dimmed, and her skin turned into a more...human...shade. Her legs lengthened, and her muscles were suddenly less than normal – not that there was any real muscle to start with, but any hint of it was gone, replaced only by slender, smooth arms and skin. Her lips became fuller, her face shape itself changed, as well as her nose.

It looked like she had gotten a total facial change in Hollywood, and not a trace of it showed – a perfect job.

But it wasn't her; while that may be the point, it didn't stop from making her feel as if she was invading the mind of someone whose body was perfect and desirable and _human._ Besides, she looked silly in that disguise while wearing starry pyjamas. She had been waiting for a 'special guest', as Tim said, to give her some change of clothes for a few days.

She liked Tim. He seemed to turn out better than Nightwing, at least, if not for the death of...

Well. She wasn't going to bring that up; she was mad, but she wasn't inconsiderate.

"Play Skool suddenly looks very interesting," a female voice chirped from behind her. She was used to Changeling's antics to even be shocked. Still, the girl was right: the TV seemed to be tuned in a children's show now. She sighed – the only indication of any emotion – and turned the TV off with her powers, careful not to mess with the circuitry, but only to press the button on it.

There was a small laugh, and the sound of wheels on carpet came.

Barbara Gordon came into view, an impish, mischievous smile on her face. Her green eyes showed through spectacles, and a stray lock of delicately curled red hair fell in front of her face. Of course, from her connection with Nightwing, she knew that this was Batgirl. This was The Oracle – the one Cyborg had been desperate to meet for so long, the one who had all the answers.

But even if she went by Oracle, Batgirl, or whatever superhero name she took, Raven knew that this woman would always be Barbara Gordon in Nightwing's eyes, in his mind.

This was the woman who Nightwing loved, a few years ago. He didn't think she knew, but she did, because every time he came home from Gotham, he would always be in a slightly better mood for a few days. He would be different for a while. His thoughts would always run to how Barbara was different, or how he felt so comfortable near her because they had known each other ever since his early days as the first Robin.

Raven felt a sharp pain dig into her chest. What was wrong with her? Barbara was Nightwing's ex, and had been for over two years. They had gotten together shortly after Trigon's defeat, but broke up for reasons that Raven had not cared enough to ask about; Nightwing hadn't told anyone, after all, and she felt as if she was invading his privacy enough without bringing it up.

Besides, this lady was going to help her with clothes (which reminded her of _why_ they blew up in the first place).

"I got your measurements from your files on the Titans database, and sent over whatever you need to wear. I'm sure Alfred is taking them up by now," she told Raven, who tried to keep a calm facade despite that growing hole full of hurt in her heart. Nightwing probably kissed her, too, and wasn't too ashamed or afraid of her unlike how he was with Raven. She knew that she should _look_ as if she was concerned about the Oracle peeking into her file, so she faked a small – a really, really, really small – grimace.

"I hope you didn't see anything too incriminating," she said, using built-up power from her roiling emotions to lift herself up off the couch. She levitated off the ground, her toes barely touching the carpet. Dear Azar, what was happening to her? She had never felt these many emotions in one day. The thought of days much like this one irritated her to no end. "Shall we head to my room?"

The woman followed her, but Raven allowed herself to slow down for her sake. She felt... something weird and wrong and annoying...but wasn't in such a bad mood to make a paraplegic feel worse than she already was.

"I'm sorry I didn't bring much," Barbara apologized as Raven encased the bottom of her wheelchair to levitate the both of them up the stairs. It only seemed polite. If Barbara made any indication that she expected this or not, Raven didn't catch it in her face or in her emotions. What, so it was normal to be levitated up the stairs in a wheelchair by a half-demon?

"It's alright," Raven replied, her monotone never wavering. She wouldn't let it change again, not after this morning. "Nightwing and I are leaving in a few days anyway."

There was a trace of disappointment in Barbara's otherwise cheerful and curious emotions, but Raven paid this no mind; it wouldn't do her any good.

"Well, that's fortunate. You can go back to _not_ pretending to be his fiancée, and all the girls will go back to having dirty dreams about Dick Grayson," Barbara stated lightly as they approached Raven's 'new' room. "Before you know it, he'll be the next Bruce Wayne of this city. Maybe even the next Batman."

Raven let out a small chuckle, but quickly suppressed it. The Oracle gave her a strange look through her spectacles, but said nothing and smiled.

"I find the thought of our little Boy Blunder turning into the Big Black Bat quite amusing," Raven said, covering up any awkwardness as she landed on her bare feet on the smooth carpet and opened the door for the both of them. Sure enough, there was only one – albeit huge – open luggage near the wardrobe. Her mirror and the spell were on the foot of the bed.

"I share that sentiment, but I think it's inevitable," she replied, heading into Raven's current guest room. The spell caught her eye, and she reached for it before she was even aware of doing so. "Zatanna's, I presume?"

Raven nodded, curious as to why Barbara would be interested. "It's just something for the mission. Why do you ask?"

There was that flare of jealousy again, this time, tinged with concern. "I see...well, I was the middle man, so to speak, when Zatanna and Batman made this...transaction. I took the liberty of researching this spell, of course. Be careful you don't use it too often, that's all. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think that everything's in order..."

"What am I supposed to be careful about?" Raven asked, curiosity piqued. Barbara seemed reluctant to talk about it, and as soon as she posed the question, the woman in the wheelchair blushed to a bright shade of red.

"Well, the spell, it, uh...it's an attraction spell, you see," Barbara muttered, her hand hovering over the joystick. "The more you use it, the more people become enamoured of you, as far as I know. I don't know the side effects, so...yeah. Be careful. It might attract unwanted attention, s'all I'm saying."

The wheelchair moved forward, and Raven stepped aside to let the woman move through, a million thoughts racing around in her mind.

"Oh, and Raven?" Barbara said as she headed towards the hallway, most likely in search of Alfred. Raven only managed to remember that wheelchair aren't supposed to go up (or down) stairs in the first place, but she found that she couldn't care less. "Don't hurt Dick. He's a good guy."

Raven sighed as she shut the door behind her, intent on trying the clothes on to see if they fit, but hesitated. She felt humbled; she owed so many people so much, and all she could do was destroy it all in the end.

She owed the Titans for saving her, but she would eventually destroy them. She owed Alfred and Bruce for allowing her to stay here even though she blew up a few rooms, and she was afraid she'd just destroy their home. She even owed Barbara Gordon, yet she didn't even say a word of thanks. She owed Dick most of all – Richard, not Nightwing – for being himself and somehow, that was enough for her.

"Hey, Raven?"

Speak of the devil.

"I thought you guys went out," she said. She let her head lean softly against the door, her hand pressing against it.

She didn't know that Richard was on the other side, doing the same.

Both hesitating to even look at each other, afraid of what might happen if they did.

Dick, fearful of pushing her away, fearful of being a cold, ruthless leader like he knew his superhero counterpart, Nightwing, would be. Fearful that he'd let his emotions get the better of him, fearful of what he would do because of them...and yet fearful of feeling these things.

Raven – afraid of feeling anything in the first place. Afraid of losing him, killing him, like she almost did when she became a portal all those years ago. Afraid of hurting, afraid of that sense of betrayal, during that time with Malchior. Afraid of destroying him.

Surprisingly enough, the voices kept quiet.

"I saw Barbara on my way here," he said, clearly avoiding the topic. His voice was clear through the door separating them both. Raven could almost see him. She could feel his emotions radiating off of him in waves – concern for her, the mission, everything. Always so caring; something that she could never be. "Was there something that she said...?"

"She just dropped some clothes off for me to use," she replied. He could almost hear her emotions showing through, and he knew that she was going to talk about something deeper. More meaningful. "Nightwing? Are you still there?"

"You know I am. And call me Dick, please."

"Fine. Dick." She suppressed a chuckle. That would have been funny, in different circumstances, and in a different context. She tried to be serious again. There was no running away from this situation. "Dick, earlier...when we...I mean, you know that I can't do that, don't you?"

He sighed. This was always her excuse. "You won't destroy everything, Raven. I have faith in you."

It was like that was the darkness' cue to start up again. Their arrival – their sound – was heralded by a distinct pounding in her head. **_You'll destroy him. You know you will. There's no running from it. Faith has never saved anyone_**.

"You shouldn't believe such things," she found herself saying, trying to drown them out with her own voice. "What can you do to protect yourself against half-demon filth...?"

"I won't have to," he reassured her, aching to hold her again, to tell her that he was here and he was strong enough to go through whatever troubles with her. "_We_ can get through this. Together."

"You're my leader. Isn't that what you're supposed to say?"

"I'm Richard Grayson, remember? Also called Nightwing. Not the other way around. You come first before some stupid mission. We can still pull out."

"Is it okay to keep going like this?"

**_No, it's not. It's unethical. He's your boss. _**

"I'm not forcing you into anything. I just want you. With me. No matter where we are."

Raven's hand hovered above the doorknob. Would she let him in? Uncertainty gnawed in her gut, silencing the darkness once again. Her thoughts were hers alone this time.

"I'll be in my room," he said, taking her silence as her lasting annoyance for what happened this morning.

He didn't know that she'd already forgiven him the moment she walked out of the room.

He turned his back, ready to take a step away from the door...away from her.

But it opened, and she was there, her face showing more emotion than it had this morning.

She didn't need to move any further; he already had his lips on hers, his arm looped around her waist. She had her fingers laced together behind his neck.

She broke free from the kiss before she lost control of her emotions again. Azar, he left her with such a buzz that she was starting to think he put on a drugged lip gloss or something.

"This...is never going to work." Her breathlessness was an indication that he did the right thing. She still hadn't blasted him to pieces, after all, so that was a start.

He barely had time to mutter an "I don't care" before kissing her once again.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Alfred, Bruce and Tim grunted as they carried a large piece of wood outside into the backyard.

"Wow, Raven's kinda powerful, isn't she?" Tim said as he stretched his sore joints. Today was so boring; Bruce had taken Richard to look for another bike, and he had to tag along, fearful of what Dick would do to him if he stuck around Raven for too long. He had caught a glimpse of the spell working on Raven, and she had been more stunning, if that was even possible. He didn't trust himself enough to stop himself from wanting to be around her more often.

"A little uncontrollable, but yes," Bruce answered as they walked up the small set of stairs. Their hands were dirty enough, and it was uncouth for Bruce himself to help in manual labour, but he was in an uncannily good mood. Not only was his 'son' back, but he had found a way to make Dick help him with the Slade case as well as introduce him to society as his heir. He was becoming old, and it was natural for him to worry about the future of Wayne Enterprises. Admittedly, though, he was still 36 years old – ten years since he took Dick in and made him Robin. Time really _did_ fly quickly.

Alfred opened his mouth to say something, but another explosion rocked the house. Both Bruce and Tim ran to the source of the sound – the backyard – but found a yawning dome of black energy around the pile of debris that they had collected, destroying its contents and reducing them to dust. The dome crackled with energy and radiated heat and a feeling of uneasiness.

"Master Dick moves in quickly," Alfred commented as he approached. "I dare say he's following in your footsteps when it comes to women, Master Bruce."

The dome widened, and all three males had to step back with caution. A crater was starting to form under it.

Bruce sighed with frustration; his bill was going to pile up even higher if Richard continued to provoke Raven this way.

But they had agreed to this earlier. Bruce knew that Raven had some sort of bigger power buried underneath, waiting to be unearthed. They needed that power to beat Slade...maybe she could even take care of Bane for him, no matter how annoying the thought was.

She was powerful, and he had to at least keep her under observation...to study it to its full extent.

Power came with madness.

And he wasn't about to let Dick suffer for it.


	12. Chapter 11

**(EDITED)**

**A/N: This is not the finalised version of chapter 11. This is a test run, to see if I can write smut, and if I get good reviews. If there are more positive reviews than negative ones, I'll keep it. If not, I have a back-up chapter that's more dramatic - a little make-out scene, an argument, and the actual event will ensue. Either versions will allow me to advance further and deeper into the plot. Anyway, this smutty version is, like, my first smut scene ever. I'm more the type to insinuate that these things happened than actually write about them, but. Whatever. xD**

**Oh, and this only lasts for a week. After that, it'll be erased from existence. So act fast, lads and ladies. ;)**

Nightwing felt uneasy as the limo pulled out of the massive driveway and onto the street. They were instantly surrounded by paparazzi, and he wasn't used to this much attention. Then again, he noticed Raven's anxiety that seemed to dwarf his, and he had to remind himself that he wasn't the only one with anti-social problems. At least he knew what to do and how to act in massive public gatherings. He hadn't spent all those years as the first Robin for naught.

"You seem relaxed," Raven pointed out from beside him, her voice different but still retaining its bland tone.

It was the first whole sentence she'd said to him since they kissed two days ago. Since then, she and Barbara had been spending time together, exchanging stories about him and discussing ways to behave like a true socialite. Meanwhile, he had been busy building a reputation. All that time led up to this moment.

A few minutes from there, Bruce would officially announce Richard Grayson as the heir to Wayne Enterprises. The attention of the press and public would be drawn to them even more if they announced Richard's bride-to-be – the heir would be settling down, unlike his mentor. It would be the perfect publicity stunt...and the perfect bait for Slade to take, according to Batman. Dick didn't have it in him to doubt the guy.

"I'm not," he answered, his throat tight.

It was the first time that he'd seen Raven under the effects of the spell that Zatanna gave her.

She was stunning, of course, as she had a habit of being. This time, however, the air around her was different, more refined. She was more beautiful, if that was even possible.

No, he didn't care about her body, or her face, or her hair or her skin. He appreciated it, but...he liked her the way she was. He wanted to tell everyone to go fuck themselves if they didn't see otherwise.

But they weren't here as a couple, they were here as teammates.

Batman reminded him of that constantly over the past few days.

A few kisses – three, to be precise (as if he would ever forget) – should not be a jeopardizing factor in their mission. He was reminded of how dangerous Slade can be, especially if he even had an idea of Nightwing's weaknesses. Slade would exploit a simple change of focus if and when they fought; he couldn't let the evil man get away again.

This time, no matter how much it went against his morals...Nightwing would have to kill him.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

"A dollar would be better."

"And here I thought you weren't the womanizing, greedy, fake type."

He had to flinch at that comment. He wanted to correct her. God, he wanted to kiss her again.

Then what would she do? He'd make her lose control of her emotions, and she'd be mad at him. She'd find a way to make it seem like it was his fault.

He kept his eyes on the back of the driver's seat.

"Stop glaring at the driver and look at me."

Her voice was commanding now. He wondered for a moment if she could control her emotions now, but remembered not to bring it up. She was probably acting.

Just like she was acting when they kissed the last time. Of course she wouldn't want to be with him.

He had to come to the painful conclusion that they could never be together, let alone see each other.

Sure, he'd have to painfully pretend that she was his for the night. But in the end, she'd go to her room and he'd go to his, and they'd both go to sleep thinking of what would – or should – happen if they could.

"Look at me," she snapped, this time grabbing both sides of her face with smooth hands and forcing him to look at her.

She couldn't take it anymore. One minute, they were kissing. Then Bruce called him down, and they hadn't even been able to literally see each other. The only indication she had that he was alive and well and not being overworked was the thrumming connection between them. She knew about the after-effects of the spell, of course, and didn't want him to be under such influence.

But all that time spent with Barbara wasn't all about learning how to act...normally. They'd been looking for other spells, or at least, ways to nullify the effects of the spell. They even went to Zatanna, but the sorceress said that she didn't know that the spell had effects at all. Raven doubted this, but she didn't press the matter, because they had found that long, prolonged periods of meditation before doing the spell stopped the side-effects from taking place for a few hours. Unbelievably, it also allowed her to get a strong grip over her powers and the voices.

She finally had some form of control over her powers, and thus could express her emotions. She wasn't going to waste it by talking to him while he was obviously bothered by something.

This was probably the only time they would have together alone anyway.

"What's wrong?" she asked, loving the feel of his face against her hands. She had to remember each sensation; it wasn't going to last long. Later, she'd have to put a clamp over her emotions again. It would be a while before she became...affectionate.

Azar knew how much he deserved it.

"We can't do this," he said, almost whispering it; his eyes were closed in the small bliss he found at her touch. He placed his hands over hers, but he didn't make a move to remove them. "Bruce told me that Slade will use _this_ against us...I can't put you in danger like that."

There. He said it. Thank God the glass partition was closed; the driver couldn't hear them, and wouldn't be able to tell Bruce about this.

He had never been so glad to be stuck in traffic.

He chuckled lightly. "When had you been able to express such emotion?"

"It won't last long." She placed a kiss on his forehead. When would she be able to do so again, was the most pressing question. It also had the most annoying answer – she would only be able to do it very rarely. "I found a way."

They pressed their foreheads against each other, their fingers intertwined against each other's to their sides. They stayed like that for a long, agonizing minute.

The limo moved forward.

Richard blamed it on the sense of urgency – the small time they had to stay like this, to say these things, to do these things.

His lips moved towards hers – cautiously.

The kiss was careful. Safe. Deliberate.

Beautiful.

Raven reminded herself to thank Barbara for giving her spare lip gloss in the handbag.

It fell to the car floor as Raven knocked it over; she shifted uncomfortably as Richard deepened the kiss.

He pulled away.

"A-are you...?" he asked, breathless once again. He had kissed Starfire in Tokyo before; this wasn't the same – it was deeper, more intimate, more delicate...and more dangerous. He had kissed Barbara before, too; it still didn't leave him as breathless as Raven's kisses. Neither of them made his heart beat so erratically to a point that he thought it'd break out of his chest. He didn't have a doubt that Raven would be there to claim it.

"I'm fine," she answered, resting a head on the nape of his shoulder. The smell of her hair made him want to run away with her in his arms. Her breath on is neck sent shivers of pleasure throughout his body. "I'm just not used to this..."

He was about to tell her that she didn't have to rush herself, even though an evil, inconsiderate, needy part of him wanted her to. He just wanted her to be happy with him. But he didn't have to say anything as Raven pressed her lips against his, erasing any thought about anything but her.

"I guess we have to fix that then," he muttered, barely pulling away, before they connected once again.

He could feel her smile at the kiss, and the small moan that escaped from her lips gave him a sensation that made him feel dirty and horny and wrong. Not the kind of wrong that made him want to pull away from her, but the kind of wrong that made him want to keep her safe from whatever he might do to her.

He showered kisses on her neck, following the trail that his fingers left. They weren't by any means soft – in fact, they were calloused – but Raven loved that. He had worked himself so hard over the years, and besides, she would think less of him if his hands were anything but the state they were in. She did not want a man who valued the quality of their skin over anything else.

His hands reached for her breasts, and he massaged them, hindered by the dress that was really starting to annoy him. Yet he could still feel her nipples hardening under the soft teasing of his skilled fingers.

Her thoughts turned into the consistency of sawdust as he positioned the two of them – in a way that only he could, only because he can – so that she was straddling his waist and he was running his hands up her smooth, flawless thighs. Any hesitation about losing anything important in the back of a limo fluttered around in her mind, not amounting to anything solid, floating aimlessly in her subconscious.

A small whimper caught at her lips as his hands explored further, settling in a place between her toned legs. The kisses on her shoulders almost drove her insane.

She was grateful for her powers being under control; she would've blown up the whole of Gotham.

She grabbed a fistful of his hair, kissing him so hard that he thought she'd kill him with the wonder and beauty and passion in it.

Her other hand managed to shakily remove the buttons of his tuxedo. They worked quickly to lift his shirt up and unbuckle his belt.

It was her turn, she thought, to drive him crazy. His fingers were sending her over the edge as they caressed _that spot_, too near the edge of the lingerie that Barbara made her wear all too gleefully, as if the woman knew what they would end up doing. She could barely suppress the animalistic purr that escaped her lips – was that even her?

She nibbled at his neck and, with a small, dirty thought, had his erection in her hands.

He gasped.

"A-are you sure...?" he asked, uncertain. What if she would regret it? What if it would make things awkward between them...?

"Shut up," she growled. She didn't like it when he ruined the mood; who cared what would happen anyway? She intended to enjoy every last bit of this moment, and she wasn't about to let him destroy it.

She wanted him, she realized with both frustration and amazement.

She had never wanted anyone so much before, and it scared her.

He grunted in response as he placed a finger underneath her underwear, for the first time touching _her_.

She was so soft and wet and warm that she almost felt embarrassed after Dick's reaction to it.

"Don't laugh," she muttered, her face tinged pink due to the pleasure and passion and just _everything_.

Her fingers worked quickly at his slacks – albeit being so shaky.

He blushed at his own body's reaction to her, but by God, he wasn't going to deny himself of it.

She bit back a scream as he wilfully pulled down her underwear and worked at what was hidden behind it. His finger went in, and his own manhood tightened underneath his boxers.

She could see it, yet could do nothing. She held onto his shoulders as if he was the only thing that she could grip in the midst of a raging storm. Her face was against his chest, and she could not hold back a moan that escaped her lips.

A million profanities escaped her as another finger went in, this time, caressing her sweet spot. Her heart pumped loudly in her ears, and Dick was unbelievably aroused by the amount of pleasure he could give her in just a few strokes.

Words held no meaning as a thousand more were lost in the air, fired by the indescribable amount of pleasure that was released within her. She, of course, had not done this before. Now she knew why Terra and Beastboy did it so often; she could practically hear their cries from the other wing of the Tower.

But fuck all of it. She and Richard would screw it up the ass and tear it a new hole.

"I need you," she whispered hoarsely in his ear, helping him off his pants. She did not need to do any profane things to his genitalia, as they were already straining against his boxers. She let out a chuckle, and pulled those off, too.

He lifted her dress as high as he could, careful not to tear it.

They were so drunk on each other that there was no need for words.

Richard slid himself into her as gently as he could, all the while trying to take away whatever pain she felt through a deep, long kiss.

To her credit, she'd screamed – a small scream from the fire erupting in her womanhood.

Her walls contracted and tightened against him, and when he nodded, she moved upward slowly. As if she didn't make him lose his mind already.

Their clothes were restrictions, yet neither of them made a move to remove any more than they already have (more so on Richard's part than on Raven's, anyway).

Their names were the only ones they heard as they bodies quickly found their rhythm. It was those tiny portions of flesh against each other, and the feeling of their becoming one in the only way that they knew their bodies could.

Their pace quickened, the strength of each thrust increasing along with it. The mention of each other's names sent them both into oblivion, shooting any chance of trying to forget this out of the proverbial window. Moans of pleasure seemed to let their connection hum with life.

They were so close, and they knew it. Raven dug her fingernails at the back of his neck, trying so hard to be careful, but the pain only fuelled Richard's lust.

One final cry. One final moan.

Then, warmth.

Neither pulled away as the release came, nor a few minutes right after it did.

Their skin, so wet with sweat despite the cool temperature.

Their organs, thrumming with life.

"God, I love you," he said, tired but pleased and...happy.

Unbelievably happy; ecstatic, even.

Raven merely laid her head against his shoulder, silent as a rock. She remained so for a few seconds, letting their bodies cool down, before she got off of him. She pulled up her underwear while trying to regulate her breathing.

He looked at her, trying to decipher what's wrong - was it him? Had he done something not to her liking? Had he...said those three words far too soon?

"What's wrong?" he asked, worry in his tone and on his face. She had never seen him display so much emotion, let alone convey such things. She could understand that.

But she couldn't say it back. The cold fingers of fear gripped her throat, as if to stop her from saying so. She knew that he wouldn't be able to say that once she had to gain control of her emotions again. He wouldn't be able to say that ever again. It was useless. Just as it was that they made love in the back of a limousine. It wouldn't change anything, she realized, and that broke her heart.

She wanted to say it so badly. She wanted to finally come to terms that she cared for him more than she should, and that by feeling like that, she put him in much greater danger than she would have liked.

She would be his ultimate downfall.

Now she knew why Barbara looked so sad whenever she talked about him; the Oracle knew this, too. Both women were dedicated to saving the world, and both of them knew that Nightwing wouldn't forgive himself if he succumbed to his weaknesses in the midst of their duties. He just wouldn't blame them for it. He would blame himself.

And that's what hurt, most of all.

It was hard to appear normal, cleaning herself up, while trying not to cry. It was the only time she could do these things...feel these things so freely. He didn't know how much that saddened her, but she convinced herself that he deserved so much better.

"Let's just get through tonight, okay?" Her voice seemed to want to be reassuring, but it did nothing for Richard. He _must_ have done something wrong.

"What did I do?" he asked, fixing his clothes and his hair. They were so close to the building; the roar of the crowd started to be heard. Gone now was the urgency, replaced by hesitation. Anxiety. He hadn't done this in a while. He worried for Raven, too. "Raven, please -,"

"It's Rachel," she corrected him, trying to work a fake smile into her face. The flashes started to permeate the inside of the limo, and Nightwing wondered why he couldn't even sense the slightest bit of hesitation within her. Did she block their connection somehow...? Why would she do that after they...? "Or have you forgotten?"

The car door opened to a red carpet. The roar of the crowd drowned out anything that Richard could have - should have - said. He stepped out nimbly, trying to keep his face friendly yet closed off, professional but attractive. Just as Bruce taught him.

He held out a hand for Raven to take. Was it just him who felt that tingle when their skins touched?

"Let's put on a good show," she whispered in his ear as she, too, stepped out onto the carpet.

A fake smile shone through their faces, heralding the start of an excruciatingly formal night. He wanted nothing more than to take her in his bedroom, or hers - he couldn't care less. He just wanted her.

But he controlled himself. The time for pleasure was over.

The Titans were back in business.


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N: Hello, earthlings! I've finally come back, after...uhm...how many days has it been since my last update on this story? I don't even know. Why? Because that writer's block came in, and I've been constantly trying to tell my brain to come up with something - ANYTHING - to write. Which has led to this chapter. I hope I don't disappoint any of you. Also, I might start writing another RaeRob fanfic, "Yesterday's Thoughts, Tomorrow's Moments" (check it out, if you dare. Mwahahahaha). I hope y'all will give it a little read, see if it'll be up to par and all that.**

**AND, before I forget, thank you to all those who have submitted positive reviews (you know who you are!) for my last chapter. I have fixed and edited the latest (and probably final) version of that chapter which I have dubbed "THE SMUT CHAPTER" *cue foreboding music**

**Now, on with the story~!**

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"Yo, guys!"

"Shut up, Garfield, I'm trying to sleep here."

"But Terra..."

"Hey, look, they're opening another museum in Gotham. Those fancy Waynes always hold the shiniest ones, don't they?"

"Hey, Cyborg. It's been a while since you came down."

"You woke all of us up, Changeling. Anyway, didn't Nightwing say that Slade was targeting Gotham places? Do y'all think he's gonna show?"

"Mustard...mustard...mustard..."

"Don't break the fridge door – damn it."

"My apologies, friends! I'll try my hardest to put it back –,"

"No, _don't_ –!"

_Bang._

"How am I still living with you guys...?"

"Because you loooooove me, Terra!"

"Not now I don't. Besides, it's _your_ fault everyone else woke up."

"But, look! That girl looks so much like Raven!"

"No way, dude. Raven has purple-ish hair, right? Wouldn't that stand out?"

"I think they would have some kind of grand plan, Cyborg. You never know if Batman is working closely with Bruce Wayne."

"That is a very amusing thought, friend Terra."

"It's possible, s'all I'm saying. (sigh) Fine, let's just watch this stupid show. I might as well fall back asleep watching it and – _hey, watch where those hands are going, buster_."

"But Terra –,"

"We're sleeping in different beds tonight, buddy."

"Wow, man, that must burn."

"Shut up, Cyborg."

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"Thank you for attending here tonight," Bruce proclaimed as he stood on the podium. His voice never lost its clarity, its demand to be heard. Even though the small strands of silver that cannot be concealed any longer marred the perfection of his hair accentuated the wrinkles forming at his eyes, he oozed with the vitality of youth and power that never wavered. The crowd ceased its clamour, and Richard and Raven took it as their cue to inch past the bedazzled crowd towards Bruce. Their moment was coming soon.

"The museum is perfect for the gala that I have hosted, and I must say that I love its new exhibit, the Mask of a Thousand Kings. Many rumours of luck and magic have risen from the mere discovery of this mask two years ago, but I'm happy to announce that Gotham is now home to its splendour."

A red curtain pulled back from behind him, allowing the audience to see the said mask, glittering under a bright spotlight, yet protected by a thick glass case. The lasers underneath it were invisible to the untrained eye. The crowd erupted into excited murmurs, failing to notice Bruce sweep his glance over them all, taking each detail into consideration. The man called Slade _surely_ had to be here somewhere.

"This isn't the only thing I'm proud to announce, however."

This silenced them.

"As you all know, my son, Richard, has returned from years of travel," he said, his voice reverberating. No one dared speak. Richard Grayson's face was plastered all over the news, and rumours of his eventual succession of the Wayne Enterprises throne did not cease since his return. It went just as planned. "From this night on, I hope you all acknowledge that I have named him my heir. I understand that he, too, has an announcement to make. If you will all give him a round of applause..."

The older man stepped aside as Richard stepped into the spotlight. He had not been under so much scrutiny before, and for a moment, a flash of thinly veiled uncertainty passed through his features. He quickly berated himself for it and instantly glossed it over with a dazzling smile.

The applause subsided, and Raven stood near him, giving off a lackadaisical air. There were no tight muscles, only a relaxed stance. To the normal mind, it would be impossible to tell that this was the form of a snake on the verge of a strike. She made a small movement to reach inside her handbag to slip on a very beautiful and very, very fake diamond ring.

"Thank you all for the warm welcome," he started with a grin. "It's good to be back. I have missed Gotham. There _is_ a certain charm to all the gloominess, don't you agree?"

Scattered laughs and chuckles were all the reaction he got. He carried on, unfazed.

"I am also thankful for Bruce entrusting the company to me. And, as he said, I have rather important news to announce."

He motioned towards the woman beside him. She stood beside the podium, seeming happy and content just being in that spot. The audience, the media...they were all captured by her beauty. She outshone the jewels gleaming on the Mask of a Thousand Kings – nay, the whole gem collection in the Gotham museum. Her smile was soft and gentle and graceful. Her provocative black dress still gave off a sense of formality and a touch of danger.

The ring glinted on her ring finger.

"I am hopelessly in love with this woman. Thus, I wish for you all to accept her and love her as much as I do...just in time for our wedding next week."

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"That ring looks amazing."

"Do you want me to buy it for you –?"

"Just so I can get into your bed again? No way, you green-minded –,"

"Hey, what's that?"

"I cannot believe you can miss the gleam of the ring, friend Cyborg! It is magnificently shiny!"

"Maybe you guys have finally agreed with me that that woman looks suspiciously like Raven's sexier human counterpart...?"

"It's so weird when you put it like that, Terra. And no, Star...I think I see a shadow in the corner..."

"...Wait, yeah, I see it too, man."

"...Is that...?"

"...A Sladebot! We must inform friends Nightwing and Raven immediately!"

"Slade is really...back..."

"Terra, it's alright...Cyborg, you think you can reach those two?"

"Calm down, guys. I'm sure they already know...they're probably already there."

"..."

"...Oh, shit!"

"Crap, an explosion...?"

"Oh, god..."

"Terra...? _Terra, _hey, wake up! Cyborg, call them _now_!"

"Changeling, _calm down_."

"Slade..."

"Friend Terra, please awaken..."

"The Sladebots are attacking them!"

"Oh, no, the reporter, she's –!"

"...Fuck."

"Where are Nightwing and Raven?!"

"Why do you think I can't calm down, huh?"

"Shit, shit, shit...argh, fine. Terra, Starfire, you two stay in Jump. Changeling and I will go to the T-ship and –,"

"I don't think there's any need for that, friends..."

"FINALLY. It took them both long enough!"

"Do you think they'd need back-up, dude...?"

"No, those two can handle things. They have the Batman on their side. And a new Robin."

"...Fine. I'll take Terra to her room."

"I'll go with you, friend Changeling."

"I'll make sure that there are no holes in security. We can't let our guards down now...especially since that man seems to be on the loose again."

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"Her name is –,"

He was cut short by an explosion directly above him.

Screams.

The end.

Except it wasn't.

A black dome of black demon energy was suddenly around him, and inside that dome was Raven.

Her disguise was wearing off. So was her control. And it was harder to concentrate on deflecting the debris raining down on them while trying not to be too aware of Nightwing's presence behind her.

"Are you alright?" she asked as the roar of a panicked crowd threatened to break what little focus she had left. She grimaced as a large cement block hit the dome, and the voices started to whisper in her ear.

**_Kill him now. No one will notice..._**

"I'm good," he said, putting a reassuring hand on her shoulder. He could see that it was taking all she could to shield them both. "The emergency van is on the alley behind this one. Do you think you can...?"

"I'll try," she replied with a small wince, not because of the effort that it took but the voices growing louder in her head. With her attention focused on the dome and their protection, the darkness took this as an opportunity to get a megaphone and scream in her mind.

She almost cried as a sharp pain invaded her temples, but bit it back. A small, imperceptible sound escaped her lips.

She imagined the location that Nightwing told her. It wasn't such a huge distance, and she could make it...

A swirling vortex pooled underneath them both, and the dome disappeared along with the two Titans, who were thrown into the alley.

Nightwing didn't take the time to berate her; it was utter chaos even from the alley. The museum looked like it had taken a really bad beating, and was ready to go down. His movements became automatic as Tim – in his Robin uniform – threw open the doors at the back of the van for them.

"Raven," Tim greeted, ignoring his senior.

"Hey, Tim." She clambered inside the van and hurriedly flashed a small, polite smile in his direction before taking her dress off, revealing lacy underwear underneath. Nightwing, too, stripped inside the van. Both did as quickly as they could, pulling on their uniforms. There was no awkwardness between them; they were so used to each other's presence that neither cared if they were half-naked in front of a younger comrade. The fact that they had sex earlier did not seem to hinder their determination to help the civilians inside and provide back-up so that Bruce can change into his uniform, as well.

Tim, however, only had eyes for Raven.

The spell was slowly starting to wear off, and traces of Raven's lavender hair began to show. Her skin became paler. Tim was entranced; how can one woman be so...perfect? It was his first time to even get a glimpse of so much of her skin, and he wondered how it felt to run his fingers through such a smooth surface.

He didn't care if the woman was four and a half years older than he was, or that she seemed out of his league, or that Nightwing already wordlessly lay claim to her. No, he was _compelled_ to be near her. She was enchanting, and it mildly annoyed him that Nightwing didn't notice it sooner...

"Snap out of it, _Robin_." Nightwing scowled at his younger counterpart, annoyed at the realization that he was staring at Raven.

Tim blinked, and nodded, dismissing the annoyance in Nightwing's tone. Maybe now was not the time to give in to his hormones.

"I should scold you three for delaying, but I don't have the time." Bruce's condescending voice cut through the thick air. They spared him a glance before he pushed past them and removed his suit, to reveal a bulky uniform. He grabbed his cowl and his belt from a corner before putting them on and moving to go back inside the museum. The trio contemplated for a brief moment how Bruce managed to slip out, but then again, it may have been because they were running a few seconds late. Maybe that was grounds enough for him to use any means to act impulsively. There were, after all, civilians involved.

"Robin, I leave damage control to you. Find any explosives and get rid of them. Pull the fire alarm to put out the fires." Bruce – no, Batman – was all business. The time for discussion was over, it seemed. "Raven, take care of the civilians. Nightwing and I will take out the Sladebots. Once you two have finished, we need as many hands as we can get to take Slade down. Are we clear?"

Silence, at that moment, meant a mutual agreement.

The three men kicked down a metal door, and Raven shook her head in annoyance. Couldn't they have asked for her help?

**_They're all stupid, aren't they?_**

For once, she couldn't find it in her to disagree.

Pulling her hood up so that it covered her face, she materialized a portal before her, ready to face whatever kind of new evil Slade managed to set against them.


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N: Wow, so little reviews? Where have my readers gone? *sobs**

**Haha, I'm just kidding. A big thank you to Xaphrin and i'm so hollow for the good reviews! :) Now, without further ado:**

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The first thing that Raven noticed was the overflowing malice and fear.

It threw her back, making her do a double take that she shouldn't have. What was this overwhelming sense of helplessness...? How was it that this much hatred could fuel such a disarming emotion...?

She shook her head, and focused on those who were in need of most help. Reverting to her soul form, she passed through felled pieces of cement and burning pieces of wood to reach a terrified female reporter (whose face looked way too full of make-up) and her accompanying camera man (who didn't look all too shabby despite the neck beard and the overpowering smell of liquor). Both cowered underneath two marble pillars that were starting to give way.

_How bothersome_, she thought as she directed her powers to form an arc under the pillars to prevent them from giving way any further. They seemed to cower as the black energy sizzled and cracked above their heads, but she just rolled her eyes in annoyance as pieces of wood on fire came down around her. She was used to this hesitation whenever she approached people, like they were afraid to even look at her.

At least she quelled their panic for a bit; the close distance between them was starting to make her head hurt. She pinched the bridge of her nose with a free hand and visualized a portal forming at their feet that would lead outside the museum...

And when she opened her eyes, they were gone.

She didn't have to look hard to where the other survivors were – the smell of fear fuelled the darkness lurking within her, and annoyingly enough, she had to get closer to those with the most fear to save them. It was routine, to create portals around their shaky legs and heaving lungs.

**_Futile_**, the voices shot at her as she made sure that no one else was there. The fire alarms started to work, and it was a refreshing change to not be surrounded by suffocating smoke, to be replaced by the cool splashes of water on her skin. The sounds of fighting occurred all around them, but at that moment, the only fight Raven participated in was that of the one inside her mind. **_They'll all die...it's futile to save them from death._**

_Don't you think I know that?!_ The amount of concentration it took to answer back almost sapped all of her energy. _Just shut up!_

"Raven," Tim said, placing a hand on her shoulder. He had successfully saved all of the remaining exhibits, but it took a lot out of him, even though he was helped by the fire fighters desperately trying to put out the fires from outside. He had then pulled the fire alarm, and now they were both drenched. In the back of his mind, he knew that he had to obtain the Mask of a Thousand Kings underneath all that rubble (or was it obliterated already? It had been too close to the explosion after all...). These thoughts were pushed away by the image of Raven standing still, surrounded by the destruction, with her fists clenched and her head hung low. He was concerned for her, and honestly did not know what she was feeling, which bothered him even more.

He didn't know that the emotions streaming from him were affecting her, too. The voices laughed and jeered as waves of pure adoration rolled off of the boy, marred only by the overwhelming sense of hatred from the fighters a good distance away.

**_Aw, the little bird loves you_**, they mocked, **_unlike that man over there..._**

_He does not love me_, she spat. _It's the spell._

**_Ah, yes...but there's a part of you that wished that he, at least, does..._**

She denied it so profusely. Of course she wouldn't want Tim to love her! That would cause all kinds of chaos and confusion that she didn't need. Besides, he was a _boy_, for Azar's sake.

**_So blindly in love with you..._**

And yet, she could sense the truth in their words. His touch was so powerful on its own that she was almost compelled to go in his mind and correct it. But that would form a bond between them, which would add to...whatever sense of security and affection he felt for her. Whatever she did to try and fix the mistake would come back and slap her in the face.

"We should help the guys now," she said, putting a hand over his and gently allowing him to let go of her. She didn't want to hurt him too harshly. Maybe putting down as gently as she could whatever he felt for her would work. Maybe. So she gave him a little, reassuring smile. "Let's not get too distracted, hmm?"

He looked at her with concern. She bit back a wince; this boy felt emotions way too powerfully. The Batman seemed to be slipping when he taught his protégées to show as little emotion. He had succeeded during his first try, though...

"Are you sure you're okay?"

A stronger headache pressed between her eyes, and she sighed, before flashing him a small smile as she passed by him, making her way towards the fighting trio. "I'm fine, Tim. We can talk later, but right now –," a small glint in her peripheral vision made her push Robin away. "Look out!"

And then it hit her.

She barely registered the pain that travelled up her shoulder as she hit a piece of cement behind her. A stray metal rod impaled her leg that she landed upon, and she finally cried out.

What was the thing that hit her...?

She knew that the pain was all mental. A series of neural impulses alerting her that something was wrong, but she couldn't block it out. Pain was the one thing that she wasn't taught to control.

A bullet had hit her square in the collar bone, becoming lodged there. For some reason, it blocked her powers entirely. She could feel its effects as some foreign thing ran through her veins, leaving trails of fiery pain as it travelled along her body at an alarming rate, taking over her demon part and nullifying her abilities. Her right shoulder was dislocated, she was sure.

She barely had enough energy to look up and see that piece of metal going through her leg. It was shiny with crimson, and she allowed a small whimper escape her lips.

There were screams of pain, but they weren't coming from her.

Someone called out her name, but the edges of her vision were turning blurry and dark...

And just like that, her head finally dropped to the ground, eyes closed and lost in a stream of utter pain that followed her to the depths of her subconscious mind.

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Nightwing saw the gun before Slade pulled it out.

The evil villain chuckled mockingly at him, standing tall with the Mask of a Thousand Kings in one hand and a gun in the other. He had single-handedly defeated the Batman, and while this should provide as a precaution for Nightwing, he couldn't stand down. Batman lay unconscious near a pile of rubble, and weirdly enough, Nightwing thought that he was the only one standing in the way of the murder that he intended to commit. The old man had been too busy finishing off the last of the Sladebots, and he hadn't noticed Slade behind him. Nightwing had been too slow to recuperate from one of the villain's blows and had not stopped him from delivering an incapacitating blow to the back of Batman's neck.

"One bullet, boy. Where do you think it'll go?" His voice, even behind the mask, sounded...old. Even while they were fighting, his speed seemed to have decreased to the point that he and the Batman were on even footing. Nightwing also didn't miss the small wobble that occurred when the man landed on his right foot minutes earlier.

"You seem desperate, Slade," he retorted, hoping that the man wouldn't use it. He hadn't used it before, after all, and Nightwing thought that this statement struck a nerve. So, was it the truth?

"I've been hoping to lure you out," Slade replied, waving the gun around and finally pointing it to his left. Nightwing's gaze followed its focus, and his eyes rested upon Tim talking to Raven. He could feel – from their bond – that she was uneasy and pissed off about something. She was distracted, engaging in a battle deep within herself. He almost growled at Slade.

"You wouldn't dare."

"I suspect that this is my last heist," he said standoffishly. "Might as well go out with a bang, wouldn't you say?"

He had imagined a million other scenarios in his mind, but not the one where he wasn't fast enough to stop Slade from pulling the trigger.

A cry of pain reverberated around him and in him; a cry of pain so shrill and pure that he had to fight to prevent himself from cringing. He let out a battle yell instead as he tackled Slade to the ground, shocking the man and making him let go of both the gun and the mask.

"You fucking bastard!" Nightwing shouted, even as he sat on top of the man's chest. It was a while before he realized that the numbness he felt in his fists was caused by them slamming upon a mask that had started to crack and break apart. His mouth spewed out a million curses as the mask finally broke to reveal a middle-aged man.

He smiled, and Nightwing's morality simply broke.

He no longer cared for the man's death. No, he wanted him to suffer.

The pain travelled through his bond with Raven, and he knew that he wanted to inflict that same amount of pain to the villain underneath him.

A hand clenched around Slade's throat and tightened its grip. The weight on his chest was relieved, and he wondered if Nightwing was letting him go, but that was short-lived.

His head was smashed on a piece of concrete in an alternating rhythm with the blows to his midsection, delivered by Nightwing's knee.

"My, my," he managed to choke out, even though breathing itself hurt. His old body could take it no longer. He certainly had a death wish – he didn't want to die alone in a hospital bed, his body simply failing him as he lay with the knowledge that he accomplished nothing. No, he wanted to die knowing that he had caused this boy pain, for him to know that reality didn't allow for superheroes who spared their enemies' lives. He had planned everything, up to this moment. "My little boy has finally –,"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU STUPID FUCK!"

Another blow to the head, and his throat was released. He fell to his knees, coughing. His eyes travelled to see Nightwing's pained expression, full of rage and unbridled hate.

_Yes, boy, let's see that side of you come out to play..._

But this, too, was cut short. He thought that he'd get away yet again due to Nightwing's 'superhero complex'; he thought he'd lie in that hospital bed, facing death with a malicious grin of his own.

He didn't expect Nightwing to raise a black bird-a-rang. He didn't expect Nightwing to lift him up off the ground by his hair, or the bird-a-rang's cool, sharp tip on his neck.

"Fuck yourself in hell."

Slade did not feel the sharp pain slicing through his neck.

No, he felt shocked. And confused.

And that was the last thing he ever felt before his body lay limp in Nightwing's grip, his blood sprayed across the superhero's face.

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**A/N: So, I needed some form of fighting scene somewhere (because, let's face it, Nightwing isn't Nightwing if he can't fight) before the hero kills the villain. And, I'm feeling nice.**

**So here's a bonus fighting scene. I hope it's good (?) :)**

His body moved on instinct.

Their surroundings were illuminated only by the bright lights of the police cars and the ambulance, as well as any luminance from the street lamps outside. All the details were filtered in his mind, his eyes taking in everything that might be used as a weapon. A few feet from him, his bo staff was lodged in a pile of debris after (another) failed attempt to somehow ram it against Slade's chest.

He stood back-to-back with Batman, but neither of them seemed to mind. It still struck him as odd for the Bats to trust him with Slade, but then again, he wasn't a kid anymore. Maybe this was Batman's way of showing that he could, at least, trust people.

"Oh, dear me," Slade said in that condescending, metallic voice. Nightwing tried to calm his nerves, but to no avail. Here stood the man who tormented him for a good part of his teenage life, and it wasn't just something that he could forget. The old terrors, the nightly paranoia...all that was because of this man; he wasn't just going to let it go. He wasn't Superman. He didn't have some sort of good-guy complex. Slade was the reason why he brought Raven along anyway – he had hoped that she would be a good distraction for this confrontation that he knew was coming. He thought that she'd been doing well in keeping him sane when it came to matters like these, but without her by his side...

"It seems I've made you tired," Slade berated, making Nightwing grind his jaws together to avoid saying a word that could provide as his enemy's arsenal to provoke him further. However, Slade only seemed amused by this display of immovability. "No words? You've grown up to be the silent man...oh, who am I kidding? You'll never grow up, _Robin_."

God, he hated being called that. Even if Raven did it almost daily, it still didn't make things better. That name reminded him of his past, of Slade. "Shut _up_!"

He charged at the man clad in orange and black, but his enemy stepped away and delivered a blow to his back, sending him crashing down on the ground, face-first. He twisted to his side at the last minute, but falling down at that amount of force only resulted in a sharp pain to his shoulder. He didn't have the time to clench his eyes shut as he would have wanted, because Slade's foot was coming right at his face.

He held up two hands to stop it, and Slade struggled against his grip. The steel soles of the villain's boots felt like they would leave imprints on his hands, even if he was wearing these gloves. He pushed it off with a grunt and made a move to position himself in a crouch.

"Kicking an enemy while he's down?" Nightwing taunted as Slade came at him, but this time, he saw it coming and dodged it easily. He delivered a blow to the man's midsection, and for a moment, felt his fist connect with not firm abs, but a softer stomach. Had Slade gotten...soft? Impossible; Nightwing wouldn't let himself believe it for a second. "I didn't think that was your style, old man."

He quickly snapped his knee upwards so that it connected with Slade's mask, and it broke off the lower half of it, showing a grim and set jaw line. He delivered yet another punch, and oddly enough, it connected with Slade making no move to block or dodge it.

It all seemed far too easy.

Just as he was about to give the villain a kick that would have sent him flying, Slade smacked his leg with the back of his hand, sending him off balance and making him resort to doing a back flip to regain his stance.

Slade grinned at him.

"Your mentor doesn't seem to be enjoying this as much as we are," he pointed out to Nightwing, making him focus his attention on Bruce.

Indeed, the guy was being pummelled from all sides. Even if the Slade bots were decreasing in number, he could see that his mentor was already weakening.

"I'll...get rid of him...just as easily as I'll get rid of you," he continued to say. Nightwing growled, and knew that there was no other choice. Now wasn't the time for games. He knew that Batman would have his head if he tried to risk his life and the mission to save him, but he didn't have a choice. If he didn't defeat Slade _now_, then he wouldn't be able to stop the Slade bots from coming at them. The villain must be controlling it from some sort of remote device in his gloves or something, if Nightwing deduced correctly (which he usually did).

He took off his gloves to remove the heavy padding inside. He had purposefully lined most of his gloves with thinly-spread weights that resulted in 5kg-weighted gloves for each hand, and he did the same to the inner soles of his boots. He had done so to add another measure of training whenever they fought anyone. It had considerably made his kicks and punches and other blows harder.

But now, they slowed him down, and the acrobatics ingrained in his system were harder to tap into if he wasn't quick on his feet.

The weights thudded to the ground, and he flexed his joints as Slade watched amusedly. The villain probably thought that this was some kind of game; that he would win over Nightwing because the hero would hesitate at the last moment, at the last blow.

Not tonight.

"Round two, Slade," Nightwing challenged, his voice taking on a whole new level of danger. "Let's see who gets rid of who before you start running your mouth."


	15. Chapter 14

Raven thought that she was dead.

Yes, that must be what it was, this blankness. For once, she didn't feel a thing. There were no pesky voices yammering in her head or emotions pressing against her barriers. There were no outside emotions that invaded her state of mind and threatened to ruin whatever control she had. There was just the darkness and some...

Some sort of...

Annoying...

Rocky...

Thing...

Pressing against her back...

Her eyes shot open, and the first things she saw were the floating rocks and blimps of light in Nevermore. Slowly, she let herself gain control of her body, checking that all parts were working. So far, nothing was hurting, or malfunctioning. Sadly, her ears still worked, which meant that she could hear her emotions blabbering away from both sides.

"Look, she's awake!" Happiness' cheery voice permeated her senses, and this sound was followed by excited murmurs. She allowed herself to sit, and while she expected some sort of headache or vertigo, it did not come.

As soon as she was able to sit properly, she was attacked from all sides by Happiness, Hope, Love, Fear and Stupidity. The colours of their cloaks were the majority of the things she saw, but she couldn't help but notice a small smile on Courage's face, or the lack of a frown in Rage's, or the disappearance of Lust's spunk, or the small motion of relaxation of Disappointment's usually-stressed muscles, or the smug smile on Knowledge's face as if she knew that Raven was going to pull through all along.

"We thought you were dead!" Fear blurted out, her tear-stained cheeks rubbing against Raven's affectionately. "I was so afraid that we'd all be finished off!"

Raven shifted uncomfortably. Even in her own mind, she was hesitant to touch people; and here, her emotions were, indeed, people.

They let go of her, one by one, noticing her uneasy expression.

"Richard needs you," Love said with a quick pat to Raven's cheek. "Go to him."

"If it wasn't for him, you wouldn't have almost-died!" The frown on Rage's face returned, coupled with a few choice curse words that Raven was tempted to block her out. "I mean, screw him! He can take care of himself, can't he?"

"We would 'screw him' if we hadn't already."

"Might I say that that was one good fuck? We should _totally_ do it again!"

"If Raven here had the courage to..."

"But what if he doesn't like us anymore? I'm scared."

"There's always hope!"

"And with hope comes disappointment..."

"Uh...I like tea..."

"Yay! I like tea, too!"

_Honestly_, she thought. There was so much going on in her head that it was hard to keep track of who was fighting whom.

"Guys, c'mon," she said, trying to quell an oncoming headache. Damn, she moved on from one headache to the next. Besides, everything was still a little fuzzy and out-of-balance. "Stop."

"Yes, Raven." Their reply was simultaneous, despite being said in numerous tones. Rage was particularly fuming on top of her favourite spot on that particular rock.

"Alright, first order of business – why am I here, Knowledge? And please tell me what happened. I don't want anything left out."

"You have receded here for your soul self to recuperate," the yellow-clad version of Raven replied, pushing up her glasses once more. Honestly, that emotion needed better-fitting glasses. "It took a while, though, because that bullet had some sort of magic-inhibiting poison that _could have _neutralized your powers for a while. We don't know what happened – and I thoroughly suspect Nightwing did it – but someone took the bullet out and cleansed your system, allowing your magic to work. But your soul self took a lot of damage from that spell, and the healing. It exhausted itself to the point that it almost broke apart, so it came here to fix itself. Your awakening signifies that your soul is healed and, more importantly, your body is in working order."

"What does 'in working order' mean?" Stupidity piped up, totally oblivious to the glare that Raven sent her for interrupting, and the piercing stare Knowledge gave her that indicated her annoyance.

"It means that her body works, but is not necessarily fully healed," Knowledge replied, acid dripping from her tone.

"That's fine with me. What about the battle against darkness?"

Knowledge grimaced and pointed to her right.

Raven shot to her feet.

About ten feet away from them was a transparent wall of energy that stretched as far as the eye could see from both of its sides, taking a beating from one lone figure: the version of Raven that looked like pure, unadulterated evil. Its black cloak billowed in the air that was due to the powerful punches and strikes that it delivered to the wall. Its eyes – all four of them – glinted maliciously at the group huddled all around Raven, promising bloody murder. Its mouth continuously opened, and echoes of a laugh so chilling hung in the air, sounding very much like how its voice sounded in her head while she was conscious. Its teeth, jagged and sharpened, looked ready to clamp down on numerous pieces of flesh. Tendrils of sizzling black energy electrified the air around the thing. Within those tendrils sprouted agonised faces letting out pained wails.

"How long will it hold?" she asked, resignation tinging her tone. She was almost sure that it wouldn't.

"We don't know," Fear sobbed.

"We're doing all we can to push it back," Hope chimed in, although sounding a bit hesitant.

"All is lost," Disappointment said, letting her cloak cover her, but her body still visibly shook underneath it. She reeked of resignation, too, like she knew that there was no end but _that_.

"We'll beat it," Courage added, fist-pumping the air. It seemed forced, unnatural.

"The spell evened out the odds for a bit, but its disappearance hit _us_ the most," Knowledge piped up. "For now, all we can do is make sure that the wall has no gaps or holes in it – the tiniest space will allow it to gain further ground. Although..."

"Go back to Richard," Love said gently. She put her hand on Raven's shoulder and smiled a little. "It'll help us a lot."

Knowledge nodded. Rage just shook her head in what seemed like disbelief. "Really?! That guy was the reason why Slade targeted _us_! That guy was the one you lost your V-card to in the back of a limousine!"

"I repeat: that was a good fuck."

"Shut the shit up, Lust! But, Raven, seriously, how can you be so fucking stupid?! Actually, no, I blame this on _you_, Stupidity! If you just stayed out of the way..."

Raven groaned and visualized herself out of there. The arguments were starting again, and frankly, she got all the information she wanted.

It was time to tell Richard the truth, for his own protection.

She had a feeling that that wall wouldn't last long, no matter how many reassurances Hope or Knowledge or Love or Courage gave her. No, she just wasn't strong enough to push back the thing that would kill all the people she loved. It was just so ironic and cliché that the thing she was fighting back was herself.

Consciousness was so close. She was in between Nevermore and the real world, and she hesitated. Would it hurt to just stay there for a while, let her soul rest and her body recuperate more before she inhabited it?

She shook her head; she didn't want to stay for all the arguments and the fighting. She'd go crazy faster than she expected she would.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sure enough, it was quiet when she got back to her body. Even though it felt like she wrestled a bull while trying to fend off a 10-tonne truck, it was still calming. There were no outside sounds other than the soft hum of the machines she was probably hooked up on, and the constant beeping of the heart monitor, and her own steady breathing...

But there was someone else.

His emotions were not her own, and she could sense his uneasiness and growing madness. He was going out of his mind with worry for her and regret about something he had done. She didn't know what it was, but it seemed terrible enough for him to feel sick about it.

"You know, if you're just going to sit there and stare at me, you might as well be useful and get me a drink," she said. She wondered how long she must have been unconscious for; her throat was dry, now that she noticed, and her voice seemed strained enough as it was.

She cautiously opened an eye to see if he had noticed her.

The silent tears streaming down his face was enough to wake her up entirely.

**_Really? You're in love with _****this ****_guy?_**The voices taunted her, but now that she knew what it looked like, maybe it would be easier to fight it off.

He had his arms around her in less than a second.

She was taken aback for a moment at the sudden change in his emotions. Relief? Joy? She couldn't tell. He was being confusing, as always. And his hold on her was really distracting. He was trying to be gentle, she could tell.

"Thank God," he muttered, his tears quickly drying. Raven felt herself smile, too; maybe it was because he was so happy that it affected her. "I've been so worried."

She didn't know what to do, exactly. Would hugging him back be enough? What if she patted his back or something? She wasn't used to this kind of thing.

"Missed me?"

Instead of a reply, he pulled back and devoured her dry lips. He didn't care if she was thirsty or not; he needed to know that she was there, and that she wouldn't be going anywhere.

She kissed back, and the heart monitor beside them suddenly shorted out and gave a little wheeze, indicating that it had been (unintentionally) destroyed from the inside.

For the moment, they were simply elated to have each other back.

xxxxxxx

**A/N: I admit, not my best work. I'll try to do better next time. Once I finish catching up to the latest episodes of the animes I'm watching. And after I read the books and comics that are piling up on my desk. ^^,**


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: Just a simple reminder that there's a bonus fight scene up on Chapter 13, if anyone's interested. :)**

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

He didn't know how to break these things to her. He didn't want to worry her, but knowing her abilities, she probably already knew that he was worried about everything that's been going on since Slade's...death. She had been in a "state of healing", as Zatanna called it; to him, she was just glowing blue all over while she slept for three days.

He couldn't bring himself to tell her that, during his fight with Slade, the Slade bots had injected some sort of foreign virus in Batman, and that they haven't found a cure for it at all. Not even the Oracle's database can find its origins, and it seemed that it was mutating to adapt to Bruce's immune system each day. Slade had one-upped them, even in death.

How can he even look at her, knowing that he'd kill someone? He'd add to her burden, to everyone else's; they were all worried about Bruce as it was. Even Zatanna came in yesterday, and Bruce had even managed to have a decent conversation with her. Now she was staying for a few more days, and he had promised the magician to inform her if Raven was awake.

Was Raven reading his mind right now? Can she even cope with the fact that he just committed murder...and even enjoyed it? Would she be able to understand the liberation he felt as he took the life of his tormentor, the one man who was a malignant presence in his life and his past, continuously plaguing his mind? Could she deal with the fact that he had only wanted to kill Slade every day ever since he met the villain?

They were heroes. They weren't supposed to act this way. Even Raven, who was surely battling with (probably) literal demons, had known to rise over that evil. She had told him that there was some form of evilness inside her, didn't she? She admitted to him, and he knew that she was at her breaking point. He was probably the one who kept her grounded.

A surge of annoyance passed through him, his fists clenching at his sides. When he needed her the most...she wasn't there. She couldn't wake up to stop these thoughts from entering his head; she probably couldn't sense it while she was in that dormant state.

He relaxed his fist as Raven gave him a small smile after putting down the bowl of soup that Alfred brought her a couple of minutes ago, probably to reassure him that she was there. He didn't need that reassurance, but it felt nice to have Raven smile at him as best as she could. He knew that there were things that stopped her from showing these things, and he understood.

He had wanted to kiss her as she had woken up – a grand gesture. He knew that she was awake before she even opened her eyes, because the glow around her body dissipated and he felt their bond tighten like someone had pulled on it from the other side. He had never let go, that's for sure.

"Alfred makes a mean pumpkin soup," she said, setting down the bowl on her metallic side table. She didn't even make a statement of acknowledgement that she woke up in a different room, one that was so sanitary and white and _cold_. It was like she didn't mind the faint stench of the various cleaning agents and disinfectants surrounding them, or the glaring fluorescent light above their heads, or the metallic _everything_. Hell, the chair had made his ass feel like it was a burnt pancake.

For once, though, Nightwing allowed himself this small luxury of humouring her. "It's not his recipe, it's mine. You'd be surprised at what a 12 year-old can put in a pumpkin soup."

"Bruce didn't mind the kitchen blowing up?" she retorted. It came to her as easily as breathing, he noticed, and he'd be damned if he didn't think _that_ was hot in a woman.

She had her ways of distracting him. But the mention of Bruce's name sobered him up instantly.

"About Bruce..." He sighed as she gave him a small frown. He knew she was probably being overwhelmed by his worry, but he couldn't tone it down. Bruce's life was literally in danger, and this time, he didn't know if... "He's been injected with a virus strain that neither I nor the Oracle can counteract...and it's been three days...the symptoms are getting worse by the hour. The virus mutates and warps itself so that it destroys the antibodies – both natural and from drugs – and soon...soon Bruce won't have any left to fight it back..."

"Dick..."

"And I don't know if he can make it..."

"Richard."

"God, he's so _old_, Raven. If I hadn't...if I hadn't been so caught up with Slade, I could have destroyed the bots before they could –,"

"Richard Grayson, don't you dare finish that sentence."

Her tone was cold and harsh and calculating, just as she normally was, yet there was a hint of threat underlining that tone. Her eyes usually told the whole story, and now, they silently pleaded for him to shut the hell up. He knew better than to argue with a recently-awakened half-demon; Changeling had been on that end of the stick for a long time, and the results hadn't exactly gone in his favour. A part of him was grateful that she stopped his thoughts from going any further.

"Who would take care of Tim?" he asked; it wasn't exactly directed at Raven, but at himself. If Batman...

"We'll help Bruce survive this," she reassured him, putting a gentle hand on his cheek. It was so soft, and he remembered watching her slender fingers as they turned page after page of one classic novel or the other. "C'mon, Dick; you know Bruce better than I do, and I think he still has that fight left in him."

There was a pregnant silence, full of the possibilities that zinged around his head. What if – no, when Bruce survived, what would he do with Nightwing's head? Fillet it, fry it, burn it, surround it with hot coals? God, the old man would never forgive him for allowing himself to worry about the Batman.

"But I don't want you to get your hopes up," Raven said, interrupting the silence and all his musings. She was about to say the things he dreaded to accept himself, and he knew that it was coming. Her hand fell from his cheeks, and her fingers consequently intertwined themselves firmly with his. "Bruce might not pull through. He's an old guy, as you say. I can't let you...build on such high hopes of his survival only to be disappointed at the end. That's even worse. But you need to accept that the Batman is just a man. He's not indestructible, he's not untouchable. He bleeds, and he will die, just like all men do. As Nightwing, I think you have to ready yourself for what you would do, as his first adopted son, to his legacy. Gotham also needs someone to run Wayne Enterprises. I can't tell you what to do, but I'm sure that you'll make the right choice and make him proud...just as you always have."

She leaned forward to kiss his forehead, but her lips only brush his skin before she pulled away with a shy smile. "We've got company."

The door opened to reveal Zatanna, still in her uniform. She took off her top hat and nodded to acknowledge Raven, who nodded back.

"Always good to see you," Zatanna said with a small smile on her mischievous face. Nightwing wondered what exactly happened between her and Batman that made the old man so untrusting of her. He didn't press it, though. Batman's business was his business, and he wouldn't go so far as to pry his nose into it (unless it was necessary – the life-threatening kind of necessary). "How's the spell, demoness?"

"I'm a half-demon, magician. Get it right," Raven snapped mildly. Nightwing knew better; it was always this tone of voice that she used when she was about to reach her limit and make Changeling eat his own innards or something. "The spell...its side-effects are strange. You're sure you don't know anything else...?"

"Oh, honey," Zatanna's voice replied, dripping with sugary sweetness that both heroes were convinced it was a lie, "it's your own charm, amplified and humanised. Haven't I explained it to you yet or have you been too dazzled by the flashing lights and the adoring public that you forgot?"

"No," Raven replied with equal parts venom. It seemed enough to make Zatanna drop the act. She put on her top hat as a sign that the game was over.

"Look, it seriously just amplifies your...charm. It made you something that you aren't – a human. That's what Bruce told me to make for you, and I have. It's not like I owe you any favours. In fact, you owe _me_ one." Zatanna sneered to add to the effect, but Raven didn't flinch. Nightwing silently commended her for that. Everyone knew that Zatanna absolutely despised her, even though she hadn't done anything wrong – except the almost-end-of-the-world-portal-thing, but that wasn't her fault. "You can do your making out, or whatever you kids do these days, later in a non-sterilized room where you'll hopefully get some sort of STD and render you infertile. Right now, I need to speak with Nightwing."

"It's about Bruce, isn't it?" he asked, trying not to seem too pretentious. He hadn't been called the original Boy Wonder for nothing, and he hadn't seen Bruce with all those women without learning something. He knew better than to act certain ways and speak certain things in front of females.

"Damn right. I'm guessing your demonic sex buddy knows about it, too?"

He clenched his jaw. Fine, let her hit him with a spell to knock him across next century; he wasn't going to sit here and let Raven take a verbal beating like that. Then again, he didn't want to be polite, so he settled for: "She's not a sex buddy, she's a friend. Now tell me about Bruce."

Raven recoiled, immediately untangling her hand from his and pressing it against her chest as if he might take it away; and he instantly knew that he had said the wrong thing. He tried to figure out what part of it was – oh, damn.

He had been so annoyed, so on edge, so pissed off at every damn thing in the world, that he still referred to Raven as a 'friend'. Way to go, Dick. It didn't make it easier that his thoughts started to sound like it was spouting many of Raven's insults.

"_Hey_, demon, you hear that?" Zatanna said, nudging Raven's arm a little with an elbow. "He thinks of you as a friend, how sweet. Fine, friends with benefits, whatever, I don't care about your creepy little sex life. What do you do, put your little black tentacle things in him? _Ew_, by the way."

Nightwing opened his mouth to ask why Zatanna would instantly jump to the conclusion that _Raven_ was the one sticking things in all those...not-to-be-named places, but she cut him off before he could even let out a single sound. The expression on her face told him that it wasn't going to be good news. "Bruce isn't doing so well, Dick. He's –,"

"_Don't_ say it," he snapped, shocking both the women. There was way too much death involved. This wasn't part of the plan, damn it! "He'll get through it. You'll see, both of you. You'll see that he'll...he'll be fine. And he'll chew all our heads off for worrying about him like this..."

"Fine, believe what you want," Zatanna snapped back. "I'm just stating the facts. Goddamnit, don't kill the messenger, right? Besides, you might want to contact Selina. You might not trust in science right now, but I sure as hell am not going to let Bruce die alone."

And with that, Zatanna stormed off, slamming the door behind her. It didn't take half a second before it opened again, and with passionate annoyance, she said: "Oh, and don't show me out of this big, creepy manor, that's fine too, chicken shit-for-brains! It's not like I wanted to talk to either of you anyway!"

The door slammed again, harder this time, but it (thankfully) stayed shut.

He could feel her glare on him, but before he could say a word, she said: "Save it, _buddy_. Why don't you go cuddle up with someone else who you'd like to fuck with, hmm?"

"Alright, that's not fair," he said, feeling himself breaking. Didn't she see it, too? "I'm sorry I said that, I should've been –,"

"What, you think I'm like Starfire, that I need to hold your hand to make sure I don't go into too many emotional pitfalls? That you need to be careful with what you say around me? _Please_."

"So you're saying that you're not mad?" _Bad assumption_, he thought instantly as the chair he was sitting on creaked. It wasn't under his weight. He stood up, just to make sure he didn't fall flat on his ass.

"I'm fucking furious."

"That's not fair, Rae. You know things aren't going so well. Cut me some slack!"

"Oh, don't make this about you now, Boy Blunder. If it weren't for you, we wouldn't even be here! Or was that your plan, isolate me and fuck me and make me your personal distraction?"

The floor cracked under his feet, but her words started to hurt. No, that wasn't...it wasn't his...

Angrily, she tore off the IV, leaving her hand bloody. She jumped off the bed and punched him in the chest, catching him off-guard and making him stumble backwards in surprise.

Crack, crack goes the wall.

"See, I was right! You know what, fuck you, asshole. You played me! You totally played me and you still can't admit it!"

"I didn't do that!"

"You are such a player, and you think it's cool to play with people's emotions, but it's not! What, did you imagine I was Barbara or Kori while we were in that limo? Did you just fuck me because you miss fucking _them_ and God knows who else?!"

"Jesus, no, Raven! I love _you_. Why would I...? I'm not that kind of person, and you know it!"

She blinked, and hesitated for a moment. Something flashed in her eyes – fear? – but it was quickly drowned out by the red literally taking over her vision. It was not a pretty sight. Still, was this the thing that she was talking about?

Like lightning, he knew what to do.

"Raven, you're my best friend _and_ my girl friend...if you want to be. You know me better than anyone!"

There. She faltered again. Her glowing red eyes flickered. He took a step towards her, and since she hadn't skewered him yet, he took it as a sign to close the gap between them.

He didn't hesitate to kiss her.

Even if she was mad, even if she was powerful and smart enough to castrate him right there...she kissed him back. And he knew that he won her back from whatever was going on inside her mind.

He knew that she wouldn't be able to do anything for Bruce, and he grudgingly accepted that. But he also knew that they were both too dark. They both had too much evil within them. He wasn't about to let Raven carry the weight of killing a man, no matter how evil that man was and how it did the world a lot of good now that he was gone.

Slowly, he pulled away.

Instantly, her arms wrapped around his waist, and he, in turn, held her. "I'm sorry. It's just...I don't know, Dick...I have these voices in my head, all the goddamn time, and they're getting stronger, and...oh God, I could have killed you..."

He kissed the top of her head. How was it that she couldn't take a shower for three days and stay in a way-too-sanitized room and still smell so wonderful and intoxicating and beautiful?

He would have to say good-bye to that. He would have to say good-bye to all the things that he knew he had ever wanted, to all the things that would make him happy. He would have to say good-bye to her.

"I'm sorry, Raven," he said, letting his lips brush against her neck, wondering if he could stay there and not have to face the cruelty of the world. She made it feel like he could do that; she gave him this sense of security that made everything _good_ seem possible. He wanted to tell Zatanna off for constantly telling Raven that she was capable of all things evil just because of the blood in her veins; he knew that she was capable of more good things than bad ones.

And he loved her. He meant it. Whenever he looked at her, there was always this disarming peace that he never got with Starfire or Barbara or anyone, and when he tried to fight it off, he knew that Raven would understand and not end up hurt or scared of him. Whenever they touched, the world became full of possibilities and goodness.

But he had to leave all that behind. A murderer like him wasn't worth any of it. He didn't have enough worth to even touch her, but damn it, he was going to keep doing so unless she pushed him away.

Which they both knew that she wouldn't do, so he had to say something so painful that it would make her stay away from him forever; she was safer that way.

"You were right. I played you. And yeah, you could've killed me. I don't doubt you. I know you're capable of it. Zatanna's right."

"Dick, what are you –?"

He cursed her for asking. Her voice was so laced with the pain he knew was going to be there, but he couldn't stop now. This was for her sake.

He let go of her and feigned disgust, even though he wanted so badly to kissed her over and over again to block out the pain.

"I mean, the sex was great," he said, hating himself every second for sounding like the vile, disgusting man she accused him of being just a few seconds ago. "But who would fall in love with you? I'm sorry, but you're creepy and weird, and it's like having sex with a zombie. And you can't even say that you love me back, not that I care. I mean, I didn't want you to love me or anything. Wait, are you even capable of that? Not that I would know."

"Get out," she growled, fists clenched at her sides, leaking black energy. "Get out! Get out before I murder you myself!"

"I'm just saying," he drawled as he turned his back. He hesitated at the doorway, wondering if he should turn around. No, not for the next thing he was going to say. "Besides, you won't be the first one to murder anyone. I've beaten you to getting Slade's blood on my hands."

He didn't stay; he simply closed the door behind him, just as he had closed off everything he ever wanted.


	17. Chapter 16

His thoughts were clear in Raven's head before he could utter a word. She knew what he was planning, what was going on in his mind, all in great detail. It almost offended her that he thought she'd hate him from killing someone. She'd forgive him, if only he'd told her, because she had killed countless others by acting as a portal for Trigon. Of course, that had ended and everything returned to normal without anyone suspecting anything, but only because of his helping hand.

She wondered if she should play along. His sadness bowled her over, and she knew that no amount of crying could ever let any of that go. He needed to have his pride intact. With the news of Bruce's impending death, she could at least give him that.

His words floated through one ear and out of the other. Even though those words were false, they stung a little, but it never affected her.

She gave herself a small pat on the back as he walked away.

He knew how to say these things the only way he knew how – by making them ugly and twisted so that no one would ever go near him. She was used to that type of pain, the kind that wants to retaliate and hurt people because one could never deal with such great amounts of it without ever going mad.

**_Look who's talking, boss_**, the darkness sneered. Raven didn't have the energy to argue. Ripping that IV was not her own wilful act – Rage had been powerful, and she was too weak to resist – and the blood was starting to stain the bed sheets as she sat on them.

**_Man, you're really depressed._**

She ignored it.

**_C'mon, I'm being nice here._**

_As if, You only want my defences down._

This was affirmed with a bone-chilling cackle.

Whatever he thought his 'darkness' was, it was the amount of evil that one could find stuck in the very deepest recesses of Changeling's bed, or the yet-unexplored depths of the Titans couch. No, it was little compared to the evil running in her veins.

That's why she let him think that he hurt her – so that he could walk away from her. Sure, he'd be hurt. But he'd know that he told the truth to someone who would keep it to her grave, and even beyond that. He would live a normal life and be rid of her.

All that mattered now was who would be the first to walk away from that one shot at happiness.


	18. Chapter 17

**A/N: Whoa, three chapters in a row! I must have been having some sort of creative literary streak...**

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Changeling! Your tofu has mould on it! Ew!"

"Haha, Terra~! You knooooow you loooooove iiiiiit."

"Eek! I swear, Gar, if you come closer, I'll crush your head under a rock!"

"Oh no, friend Terra, I don't think that would be advisable!"

"Honey, I would turn into a little bug."

"But I'd crush you under my boots!"

"Friends, we must stop this arguing!"

"Terra, baby, you can't crush an insect that can turn into an elephant."

"It'll make you an easier target, dumb nuts."

"Friend Terra, won't you accompany me to the mall today?"

"Guys, please, I'm trying to work up here..."

"See, even Cy agrees that you shouldn't abuse me like that! He even comes down more often!"

"I'm confused, friend Changeling. Isn't friend Cyborg on that...platform...above ground, thus making him up, not down?"

"..."

"Hee hee, Starfire, you're the best! That totally shut him up."

"Hey! I understood all that...sort-of..."

"Wonderful! I'll make the Pudding of Understanding!"

"No, wait –!"

"Heeeey Staaaaarfiiiireee. Changeling says he wants more of that, so double the recipe, girl!"

"Cy, help me!"

"I'm working, bud."

"I would be most delighted, friend Changeling!"

"Terra!"

"Aw, Gar, you love it, don't you?"

"You'll pay for this later, Terra."

"What're you going to do about it, grass-for-brains?"

"I'm going to _rock_ you so hard you scream –,"

"Ew! You stupid grass stain, that was way, way, way too much information, bro!"

"You shouldn't have been listening then, metal man!"

"I have enhanced hearing, doofus!"

"I do not understand. How will friend Changeling _rock_ friend Terra when he does not have her powers?"

"Don't worry about it, Star. Garfield Logan's little _rock_ will turn into a frankenweenie once I sic Raven on him."

"But how can rocks turn into sausages, friend Terra?"

"Just make the pudding for the grass stain, Star. God knows he needs it to wash that language out of his mouth..."

"As you wish, friend Cyborg..."

"Terra, no, not Raven!"

"I'm going to call her!"

"No!"

"Here I go..."

"No, Terra, I beg of you, baby!"

"And my finger's going down..."

"Well, okay, that's just not fair! Give the communicator!"

"I – wait, Raven beat me to it. Huh. She must be super psychic."

"Oh, _no_."

"Oh, _yes_. Dude, total payback for what I just heard."

"Hello?"

"Hey, Rae. How were the clothes I packed for you?"

"..."

"They're gone forever, aren't they."

"You could say that..."

"You're going to have to pay for each one, you know that."

"Most of it was mine, Terra."

"Fine, whatever, but you pay for what I lent you!"

"I didn't even borrow anything..."

"Hey Rae, how's my baby girl?"

"Hey Cyborg, what – what are you doing up _there_?"

"The light went out because Changeling and Terra –,"

"_OKAY_, way too much information. At least now we know it isn't totally my fault whenever a light goes out, right?"

"...Please don't insinuate that ever again."

"Why, Terra, I'm insulted you'd think I'd insinuate such things."

"Your monotone voice irritates me..."

"Doesn't it always?"

"Whatever. How was the mission? Are you guys going home soon?"

"..."

"What's wrong?"

"Batman...is dead."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"...What?"

"Don't make me say it again, Changeling. What's the use of those ears if you aren't going to use them properly, for once, and listen to me when I say something?"

"How did it happen?"

"You really want to know, Terra?"

"I need to. I think."

"It was Slade. One of his bots. His...farewell gift. The virus can't be cured. Batman's barely hanging on. The whole League's been called, and even the Oracle is still working on it, but...everyone just seems to be waiting for the inevitable."

"...So what now?"

"I think Cyborg will be in charge of the team for a while, but...I don't know. Nightwing's in a really bad state right now, and...we're not talking. I don't think either of us will be home for a while, either."

"What?!"

"Oh, no, friends, please, don't!"

"Raven, what are you saying? You can't just –!"

"Are you saying you're leaving?"

"One at a time, guys, please. I'm stressed out enough as it is."

"..."

"...You're leaving us?"

"I'm sorry, Star."

"So you're eloping?"

"No, you stupid green piece of waste. Why would I _elope_ with that guy?"

"So why are the two of you...?"

"It's hard to explain, Star. The Robin from Gotham – Tim – will take Nightwing's place. I think Cyborg would still be the leader. And...there's a new comer, and the Martian Manhunter is bringing her here tomorrow so Nightwing and I could assess her."

"Another Martian? But I thought...?"

"Distant relative, it seems. But there will be more recruits."

"...Raven, you have to understand that new team members won't replace you. Or Nightwing. Just – are you ever coming back?"

"..."

"Raven?"

"...I'm not sure."

"Fine! Leave!"

"...Terra..."

"We all apologize for friend Terra's reaction, friend Raven. Is friend Nightwing coming back?"

"...No. I don't think so."

"..."

"Star, don't cry..."

"She has every right to cry, Rae."

"Sorry, Changeling. I don't think Nightwing wanted to give you his role forever, it's just...we thought this mission was going to be quick, with Batman involved, and now...it's all such a mess."

"..."

"I'm sorry. For all of us. Say sorry to Terra for me, will you?"

"I'll make sure you have a home to come back to, Rae."

"Thanks, Cy. Call Nightwing, see if he picks up. He's bad, but...you should see the other guy...you know? Bye, guys. Thanks for everything...I'll come back, I promise. Maybe not tomorrow, or next week, or next month, but...I'll come back and try to make things right again. Raven...out."


	19. Epilogue

The city is calling out to him. Screams of help and answering police sirens, the sound of thumping music bleeding out into the street and into the bones of the people within it – the sounds wash away his memories, his past.

No matter how much he tries to escape it, this is all he can find solace in.

His fingers clench, his gloves squeaking ever-so-silently in the dim darkness of the rooftop high above Gotham. His mask suffocates him, and he very much prefers the days when all he wears to hide his identity is a mask for the eyes, but now it hangs down the bridge of his nose.

It is heavy.

Still, he cannot bring himself to relinquish it.

There are days when he considers it, when he daydreams of running and never stopping until he finds that one woman, if only to find closure. He dreams, during those few, restless hours that hang between darkness and light, that his heart still beats and his blood is still hot with excitement and exhilaration.

But he wakes up, and has to immerse himself into reality again. There can be no dreams. There can be no hopes or empty wishes.

All his days are filled with the regular villain who thinks him(or her)self better than he, or maybe the odd thief or two who wants to squeeze in some crimes in the wee hours of the night just before he finishes patrol (he hates it, but of course he has to do it, because who else will?). He cannot trust anyone to do his job, and it is a curse, never a blessing.

_Eight years…_

He can only ever count it as a blessing whenever he futilely wishes for things to have gone differently that night; if they had, then he would have gotten the mask of his own volition, maybe even with the enthusiasm to accompany it. Maybe, if _she_ had stayed with him, there would not be this empty void in his chest – a yawning space that he cannot fill, no matter how much he _wants_ to, because the closer of that space is the only thing he _wants_ nowadays, and it's so fucking unfair that someone like him has to –

_Well_.

His fingers unclench, but he can still feel the small, momentary indentations left in his palms.

So, when he steps back into the darkness, he doesn't think of her.

He doesn't want to think of that void just yet.

xx

She can see him, but he cannot see her.

It is, of course, typical of him to still be so dense, so _blind_ like a bat in daylight. He comes into the café every morning to grab his morning coffee, looking haggard. Dark circles riddle his eyes and are only covered by expert make-up skills. His dark hair is only ever one strand out of place – if only on those rare occasions when he does not show up less than perfect. His glasses glint when the sunlight hits them just right, hiding his eyes from view.

He is still hiding, still paranoid.

Those glasses are a farce – a trick he might have learnt from Superman – and his hair is too…smooth, like he pays too much attention to it even though it is only the clever use of gel and conditioner that can make it look like that.

She wonders how he cannot feel it – the sudden tensing in the air and the momentary pause of the world.

Or maybe…he's forgotten.

She prides herself in believing in the latter thought; the former one can only bring so many bitter memories and high hopes that will inevitably bring her down…lower than she is now.

Or…maybe it's because of the control she has on her powers.

She can smile, even laugh, although it is quite taxing to do so because she is not used to it. She can still last ten seconds without having her face go blank, which is a major improvement from all those years ago. In fact, she's even learnt how to laugh without actually being amused.

Maybe it's because, after years of research, she finally found her answer: she cannot exist in her body any longer. It had been sitting in front of her all along – her _body_ had been the cause of that evil blood and it is this that has to be discarded. It took her a while to execute the process of tearing her soul out of her original form and going into an old one. While she's eternally grateful for the body of this slim, bird-like woman whose corpse she found in the morgue, she cannot help but jump every time she looks into a mirror. Her powers helped in healing the woman's body of its bruises and cuts – had she been abused? Hurt in some way? She can never know, not now – and then brought the body back to life…except _she_ is the one residing in it, now.

The process had been lengthy, but by the time she'd finished and went to fulfil her promise to her friends, they weren't there. Victor had joined up with the JLA. Logan and Terra…who knows? And Starfire had gone back to her home planet to rule as queen. Out of all of them, Starfire was the only one she had managed to contact and, even after she'd explained it, her friend only had apologies and polite hellos to give before having to go back to her own business.

It seems that they have all moved forward. She was the one stuck in an endless, dark loop, and she immediately planned to get out of it.

And that's how she ends up working nine-to-five at a 24-hour café right across Richard's building.

When she smiles and hands him his coffee, she thinks of all the things she can say. 'I'm sorry' or 'I'm back' don't seem to be right. She had almost killed him. She saw – hell, she _felt_ – his soul break into a million sharp shards behind his hooded eyes.

She can even feel his trepidation, his utter _distaste_ for the world every night, when she can hear him swing by her apartment on his favourite 'perch' on Wayne Enterprises.

A dead giveaway, and also an ironic (and cliché) one.

She almost laughs at him.

Almost.

That's all she can amount to. The midpoint of things, stuck in limbo between revealing her identity and not, placed in a position of uncertainty on whether to call him out on perching like a true bat as if he's trying to _scare_ people into their homes, not reassure them.

That's what heroes do…right?

She can't be sure anymore.

When she hands him his coffee and he pays and leaves, she allows herself a small frown.

Go after him? Call after him?

_No_.

She looks up. "Hello, my name is Rachel, what can I get for you today?"

.

.

**A/N: **I swear I've posted the epilogue to this before, but according to , I haven't, which pisses me off greatly. I'm so sorry for the long wait. I've written a different epilogue and a happier ending, but I thought I'd posted it and I didn't think I'd have to look at it again. But, the new comments on this fic has made me realise that no, I haven't posted it. And I couldn't find the original file as well (I think I cleaned out my laptop's hard drive to fit in two new drawing programs). *rage* Anyhow, I hope that this was to your liking. And I'm wondering – who caught on to the fact that the title of this fanfiction has the initials "D.C", which is the comic that these characters belong to? And who caught on to the circular metaphors and whatnot I scattered here and there? Eheheheheh. Well. If you did, good on ya.

To all the people who have waited and watched and read ever since this fic was created: THANK YOU SO MUCH for the support and feedback. I'm glad that y'all actually like my writing. I won't be writing any more RaeRob fics, or any Teen Titans fics (the other one has been abandoned for a greater cause by the likes of "The Learning Curve", "An Introductory Lesson" and "Always Be With Me In Mind" – all belonging to the oh-so-perfect ichiruki pairing of the Bleach fandom), and my other one is still up for adoption. PM me if you want it, because I will gladly give it away.

And, for the last time (at least, for the readers of this fic): _Ciao, my lovelies~_ *bows*

-C.E


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